a week in my mind and you won't want to go home...

Sunday, 26 April 2009


01:10 Posted by Sir Scribbles 4 comments
Some of my friends think I'm crazy, they so I'm so random I make the word sound consistent. It's nt my fault that's the way Scribblenation works....Scribblenation is the name I gave my mind...I'm crazy right? lol. Anyway I was thinking of something to blog about and I decided to talk about myself and where else wud I start than in Scribblenation. So on Tuesday I watched another episode of Heroes and read a few comics, yes I said it, Comics!!! Under this flamboyant persona is a lil' Nerd and I can't deny it!! I started thinking about Superman and Batman and realised how poor their tastes are in fashion, Superman can shoot heat rays from his eyes, stronger than a moving locomitive and faster than a speeding bullet right? Batman is like mega-super rich with all his gadgets right? yet both of them wear tights, then wear big-ass pants on the tights and with boots to match, Superman wears a big red pant for crying out loud and batman dons the black leathery version...thanks for saving the planet man of steel but wen r u gonna come out of the closet?!!!

On another random note it's been eight months since my last relationship, personally I don't like the way my CV is lookin wen it comes to girlfriends, at the start of the year I planned to be single till 2010 cos I wanted to concentrate on skool, work and all d other boring stuff in this life but it's almost May and I'm going crazy here...the environment isn't helping either, I go out to buy milk and there's a fine girl in the store, I go to the Library and there's a fine girl sitting beside me, I get on the friggin bus and that's wen all d pretty girls in Essex want to get on the bus lol...maybe I'm just paranoid. Anyway, if I do make it to 2010, which I seriously doubt, whoever ends up going out wiv Scribbles should just be prepared for some crazy pampering and attention...don't say I didn't warn u though!!!!

People say I'm random, can't imagine why, BTW wat's up wiv this friggin "global economic crisis"? I don't want to hear stories wen I'm done wiv skool and lookin 4 a job! I've invested half my youth to be in classrooms enduring hours of frustrating lecturers and nerve wrecking examinations so I expect my divident to be paid in full including benefits no jokes! If they wanted to crash the economy they should have told me on time so I'd change my career prospects from educated unemployed graduate to uneducated friggin rich footballer or rapper lol

I'm nt that random...noooo!!! I prefer dynamic..speaking of dynamic DAMN YOU FACEBOOK AND YOUR FALSE PROMISE OF IMPROVED SOCIAL SKILLZ THROUGH ONLINE SOCIAL NETWORKING!!!!! I need to meet new pple, preferably chicks and Facebook friend requests don't count. I'm a bit reserved wen u see me 4rm afar but totally different wen u get to know me so maybe that's why pple seem to shy away 4rm me at first...well that's probably going to change 4rm now on...gonna be very spontaneous. The problem is once I've posted this blog I'm gonna type in facebook's address and be back at square one...I feel very ashamed and weak-willed lol.

I've just taken you on a tour through Scribblenation but unfortunately due to reader frustration wiv long posts and my need for a social networking fix I'll stop here...speaking of which I use to have this pen pal...no no no that's a story 4 another blog. Peace out and as a wise man once said "To infinity and beyond!!!"

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Saturday, 25 April 2009

Revelations of Little Insanities Part deux

03:33 Posted by Sir Scribbles 4 comments
Entertainment, Women and Madness: Okay for years now women have been pushing the whole equality thing in societies. They want equal rights as men and want to get the same treatment men get at work, play etc. I'm not against this and it's all good but it's like the female resistance has a few saboteurs in its camp. I'm referring to the booty shaking, thigh spanky, waist twisting mamas we see on TV. Now u r wondering why I, a guy, who's supposed to cherish such sexual displays would be complaining shey?...Well I'm not but it's quite unreasonable to fight for a cause which is being hindered by members of the same group. I'll give you an example, consider the usual content of a music video by a famous Rapper, Money, things money can buy like cars, clothes and bling, tight song with bumping beats and let's not forget Women! I'm not overexaggerating when I say 20 Women can be found booty bouncing on 1 Rappers music video...,what does that tell u...Mathematically it means 1 man is directly proportional to 20 women...and what is this man probably doing, spraying money on them while instructing them to bounce it, move it and grind it and like good lil' video girls they do. This is why I say demanding equal rights is an attempt at futility if women cannot rally themselves and respect themselves then they can't be respected. I'm not Gay ooo! but I hear women complain all the time about being seen as the inferior specie but why won't it be so when One man with a Jeep can fill his back seat with more girls than an MSc class in a University. I fight not for the opposing camp but I'm being diplomatic by saying Women who want the same rights as Men should take care of the Lunacy within their fold before addressing the societal gender related lunacy.

Underwear is meant to stay under: This is like the "maddest" thing I've noticed in my life, I mean it's absolutely mental...KOLO!! dats wat it is I tell u. I went to see a friend the other day and on my way back he offered to drop me off at the train station, naturally an Igbo boi like myself no go pass up opportunity to save a few quid u know wat am sayin' lol so I agreed. We stopped to get fuel and when this dude goes to pay I notice his trousers are falling off...or so I thot...as in he walked into the store and out again wiv his pants nearly at knee level, I didn't say a word I mean i don't associate wiv mad pple so I wasn't going to brand him one yet but if he wanted to only clothe himself to knee level and show everyone he liked scooby doo he should have just worn socks and boxers abi? At the train station I saw yet another dude wiv his jeans at "below butt" level...nd he had white boxers on....4 God's sake DUUUDEEE I'm not supposed to know the colour of boxers u wear mahn!!! Okay the next day I'm in a supermarkert and a group of chicks walk past me, naturally I start scouting for my potential missing rib but I doubt God used my rib to make mad pple! Blue, pink and black, those were the colours of their undergarments, I mean I'm trying to buy cereal here and you're walking around wiv power ranger colour co-ordination....Insanity alert pleeeaase! This even reminds of the one time back at Uni, I was in the school cafeteria with a friend of mine and we were having a meal and this chick was standing beside our table, we didn't notice her at first but u can trust mad pple to get noticed. She bends over to pick up a key, pencil, spoon, her dignity wateva and right there, not up to two feet way from my face, where I put my food is the crack of this chick's stretch-marked butt...I mean we were eating for crying out loud! another scenario and it might have been nice but this was just unfair and unhealthy...remembering it now dey make me vex sef...The chick stuck her ass in my face mahn!! while I was eating...Kai! 4 mad pple!

Wednesday, 22 April 2009

87.9 Scribbleselecta FM

19:23 Posted by Sir Scribbles 1 comment
Wats up Chicks and Dudes of the Blogoshere this is DJ Scribbles bringin u the latest gist 4rm the Music industry, 4rm bumping beats to lyrical mayhem there's so much to talk about but urs truly has selected only a few to bring to your lovely ears (eyes lol) today. First off I'd like to say that the music industry seems to be getting a bit repetitive in the sense that songs are actually starting to sound the same, it's lacking some originality these days...or maybe it's just my playlist. Anyway, I've got a new best friend on itunes and his name is Asher Roth and for those of you who don't know him I'll give you a short intro, THE KID IS OFF THE CHAIN!!!!! I'd been seeing some posters and adverts about this kid but never really took notice until I ran into his version of the "A milli song" originally performed by Lil Wayne. I was sooo impressed that I did a lil' more digging and I must say I was impressed even more, give a listen to his version of Roc Boys as well tagged "Roth Boys"

Yes pple he's a white kid! The first comparism that springs to mind is Marshall Mathers but I doubt he'll be the butt-flashing maniac that Eminem is or was lol. I won't bore you with his bio or stuff like dat but I suggest you google him, youtube d dude or just buy his CD, here's another song of his that's also racking up play counts on my itunes playlist,

Next I'll take you to Naija for another personal favourite, now DJ Scribbles may not be the as up to date as before wiv jamz 4rm the motherland but I'm a sucker for killer beats and choruses and these gentlemen have found their way into my headphones one way or the other. The first is Ill Bliss and Terry G's "Aiye po gan"
and the second's Ruggedman's "Bangin"

Finally, the last but definitely not the least on my list is Clyde Carson wiv The Game and Sean Kingston, a definite beat bumper nd I personally love d chorus...

Okay pple till next time this is DJ Scribbles for 87.9 FM Scribbleselecta saying "If we all show some love to the person next to us we'd all be living in a much better planet" Peace!!!!

Thursday, 16 April 2009

Thoughts of the Scribbler 2

05:53 Posted by Sir Scribbles 3 comments
We are all drawn to one another as if fitted with invisble magnets looking for others of attractiing polarity. Why do we make friends, find partners and want lovers? It is as if we are all created to socialise by default, Is it a habit or an addiction? A blessing or a curse? You can explain this scientifically, socially or spiritually but the question still remains. I may chatter on and on about how beautiful a girl is or how much I love a lady but what then makes one person more appealing than the other? It is deducible that we are all born with preferences and selection criteria for people making us somewhat unaccoutable for the kind people that attract us...or maybe we are born with a clean social slate and then develop into wanting specific people and rejecting others. Pondering on this has infact left me with no concrete answers but I believe that if we didn't have preferences and criteria for people then we'd have taken another giant step towards the utopia envisioned by many, after all it would mean everyone had a friend!!!

Thoughts of the Scribbler 1

05:31 Posted by Sir Scribbles 1 comment
Why am I a man? I use to be a child, carefree and non-chalant, I had no worries and no troubles, my mind use to be filled with unimpotant things and caution use to be constantly thrown to the wind....I use to be a child but now I am a man. Money, Women, Power and Achievement never thrilled me like the adventures my imagination created for me...I may be a man but as a man what am I supposed to do? One must ask these type of questions at certain points in life to really know the purpose of living. The simplest answer could be that I am a man because that is who I was born to be, I may have been born with no worries, no troubles than those created for me but my life as a child was without responsibilty because a man prevented them. I was a child yes; but today I am a man, grown out of a child into fullfilment. I am a man who will worry, fight, struggle, face trials and make decisions so that the children are safe. If I do my job well then children will learn, emulate and later become Men of a similar nature. Sometimes I fret, I shudder at the thought of my job, one I did not apply for but was ordained to perform....sometimes we need help from this world and beyond but in the end if all men took their job seriously maybe this world would be a better place for children....afterall they say it's a Man's world.

Wednesday, 8 April 2009

Mekus my guy!!!

16:46 Posted by Sir Scribbles 6 comments
This is a true story, the names have been changed to protect Identities

I looked out the window nd the clear blue sky fueled my enthusiasm even more, I felt like doing something for a friend today, I just woke up and felt like making the day special and doin something for a friend that we'd both remember and possibly share a laugh over. Another reason why I wanted to do this was cos a few hrs b4 at about 12am a friend had infact done something for me aas well nd I wouldn't forget it for a long time, it was only fair that I carry on the good work and do something really memorable for someone else afterall I am a nice guy. I thought long and hard about whose life I'd affect, who I thought about the perfect candidate and a bunch of my friends came to mind but one stood out, he was such a nice guy, a real good fella nd doing this to him would mean alot to me and he'd probably never forget it ever, I planned it all day, I wanted it to be a surprise, he'd neva see it coming.

I walked into Emeka's room smiling and if he'd been psychic he'd have known it potrayed my intentions as well. I sat down and the following conversation ensued:

Scribbler: Guy how far wetin dey happen?

Emeka: I dey oh! Wats gud? dis one wey u kon see me so shey mosquito chase u comot ur room abi u miss road?

Scribbler:"U see wetin I no like about u 'mekus, I come here peacefully but u wan start war abi? anyway I wan ask u something.

Emeka: No vex na I just dey follow u play. wetin u wan ask?

Scribbler: Guy I wan know whether u get Visa, u don travel go jand b4?

Emeka: Which kin question be dat? na so dem dey ask question? If I neva go b4 nko wetn happen?"

Scribbler: Guy no be fight I just wan' know coz I get something wey fi' interest u but if u no wan answer no wahala

Emeka: Ehn I neva go jand b4 but but dat one no mean anything wetin u bring come 4 me?

Scribbler: Well my papa just call me 2day tell me sey embassy send am letter, sey dem don select some pple wey get Visa b4 to suggest one person wey we sabi nd we fi' vouch for make dem give dem visa too, I think it's like a raffle draw and na our names comot

Emeka: Na lie!, guy na lie!, no follow me play o! u see dis iron i go use am scatter ur head, if na joke stop am?

Scribbler: "guy dis one wey u dey show violent tendencies I no go fi' vouch for u oh! u fi' be terrorist"

Emeka:"Nooooo guy no vex u know sey na so I dey play, Omo me go like Visa oh! how e go be"

Scribbler: "Okay I no know the main stuff yet but u go just write ur info for paper give me and I go call my papa tell am l8r today, stuff like date of birth, state of origin nd all dat"

Emeka:"Guy no dull me oh! Me sef wan go jand go chop mcdonald's nd all dem oyibo ishe"

Scribbler: "Nthin do u guy, just give me d paper nd by evening I go let u know wassup"

Emeka:"MY GUYYY!!!! U know sey na u be my guy if anybody fi' be my only guy na u guy!!"

Scribbler: "No whine me jo make I reach girl's hostel I go show ur side l8r. safe!"

Emeka:"U don dey go fin' woman shey notin do u ooh! no dull ur guy sha!!!"

9:32pm, I'd told my friends about what I was up to with Emeka a they seemed eager to know the outcome of it all so I called Emeka into the room where we all were and started giving him the details of the situation

Scribbler: Mekus my guy u know sey I gat ur back

Emeka: Baba no dulling oh! wetin ur papa talk

Scribbler: Well en talk sey no problem sey en go forward your name to embassy very soon, of which no be only u sef but en go call me when en hear anything 4rm them. Shey u grab?

Emeka:Okay oh! Guy u wey no like to answer phone shey u no fi' give am my number at least? I no trust u oh wen it reach phone call side

Scribbler: Guy no worry dis one na serious matter I no fi' fumble, anyway I just talk sey make I tell u wassup, I dey go my room

Emeka: Anyhow na, we go see later.

I stood up to leave the room and my friends were snickering but I pretended not to hear them, As i turned the door handle I glanced back at Emeka with a grin on my face and said "Oh! 'Mekus I forget tell you one other thing.... APRIL FOOLS MAGAAAA!!!!"

You should have seen the look on his face it was priceless, shock, disbelief and anger all in one...the anger was probably what led him to chase me round the hostel with a plank but it was worth it...oh it was worth!!!

Sunday, 5 April 2009

Revelations of Little insanities Part Un

15:31 Posted by Sir Scribbles 4 comments
Little insanities and revelations is my attempt to enlighten you concerning little things we ignore everyday that are actually signs of insanity....nuf said LET'S GO THERE!!!

Eve revealed: Okay I'm not a sexist or anything but I believe the whole wahala we r facing today started from Eve and I'll tell you why. Okay God created Adam right?, put him in charge of the garden of Eden and all dat, in my opinion I believe Adam was one chilling, intelligent handsome dude...I mean d guy was the God's first prototype! He had a job which was caretaker of Eden, a house which was Eden itself and he was good at his job. You know he named all the animals with no repition or mistakes, imagine how many animals he had to name and he didn't forget, call in sick of skip work for one day! God told Adam nt to eat 4rm the Tree of "Open eye" nd he didn't all through his time as the sole tenant of Eden. Then Eve comes along with her sexy first-woman-in-the-world-curves and messes everything up. Adam had been chillin in Eden wivout even lookin at that tree, he passed by it on his way to work, probably even sat under it for shade and never for once even considered eating 4rm it but Eve on the other had is like the first insane person ever....here's a typical non biblical interpretation of Eve's first discussion wiv Adam after God introduced them and Adam named her

Adam:"Hey babe wats up?"

Eve:"I'm cool, I like wat u've done wiv the place"

Adam:"Yea yea it's a cool crib isn't it, so wat's a girl like you doing in a place like this?" they both laugh (Adam had unrivaled charm cos he was the first man and pick up lines weren't cliched yet)

Adam:"Come let me show you around"

he gives her tour of his crib, the rivers, the fields, the different fruits and animals...every every but Eve looks curious....

"Hey U've showed me almost everything here but wat about that odd looking big tree with ripe fruits that u didn't point out to me?"

Adam pretends not to hear her and gestures her to keep walking while he sucks on a luscious looking tangerine.

"Hey Adam didn't u hear me, what about that tree in the middle of the garden? you skipped dat one"

"Oh that one, well Baba God said I shouldn't eat from that one...I didn't name it though, kinda slipped my mind since I neva actually eat from it...forget about that one let's keep walking I want to show you a trick I thought the Lion and Zebra yesterday".

She eyes the tree curious like any nagging unsatisfied wife....unknown to her the devil had noticed., what you should ask urself is "why didn't d devil tempt Adam siiiiince? afterall he would have been easier prey cos he was alone before Eve came, strategically Eve was a riskier target". Now not up to a year living as housemates with Adam and she gets both of them kicked out by God, she didn't even tell Adam where the apple was from, she just took a bite and gave Adam...the innocent creation trusted his wife and she rendered him jobless and homeless by succumbing to the exact same thing Adam had resisted...infact not resisted but ignored throughout his tenure as sole caretaker of Eden...imagine the fight Adam and Eve must have had after being evicted...lol...Adam must have been livid, imagine moving from a five start hotel to Sango Ota lol...or Karimo....Eve it's ur fault!

Mad handbag chick: One day I was on the tube seating opposite a lady wiv this big lovely bag, she was fine sha and I almost considered chatting her up....until she show me sey she dey craze!!! Her phone rang, the ringtone was Oyoyo family's song "Okoro", that one first threw me off cos I expected something a bit more tush, nothing against the song but at least make she form small!!! she opened her bag and started searching for the phone, like I said the bag big gan! she hissed and the song kept on playing annoying the crap out of me...I don dey vex cos she couldn't find the phone, the person on d other end didn't think it sensible to cut the line and Okoro was still blasting 4rm the bag. She finally found it and sighed staring at it, Okoro had stopped playing so I figured it was a missed call. She threw the phone bag in the bag and 30 seconds later the phone rang again "U play me ojoro, u call me okoro...." she started looking for the phone again...as in I was shocked, I was amazed and pissed at the same time...as in it was like a de ja vu...she rummaged through the bag again hissing and the phone was still ringin'. She found it again and answered "Hello...Temi is dat U...Temi...dis international call dey f*&k up can u hear me?" she stared at the phone and did the most mental thing as far as I'm concerned....she threw it bag in the bag, I went crazy in my head cos she was obviously mental, any sensible person would hold the phone in their hand or at least in an easily reachable place, she had spent almost a whole minute looking for the phone at first and then she threw it back in d bag...twice!!!...no be craze be dat tell me?!....and I swear no be lie the phone rang for the third time, I was getting off the train and as I was leaving i heard it again..."U play me Ojoro, U call me Okoro..." I looked at the pple around her nd I know they wished deep down inside that this was their stop...