a week in my mind and you won't want to go home...

Wednesday 3 June 2009

Today....

13:30 Posted by Sir Scribbles , 14 comments
I've got so many things I want to post but this had to come first coz it made me real happy today...

I go to skool once a week but haven't even been in skool since the week before easter cos I finished my lecture hours ahead of most pple in my post graduate class. Since then it's part-time job hunting for me wiv lil or no success, I use to work at a friend's night club but that one don dabaru like many Naija owned buisness here. Didn't want to do all those Maccy D and KFC jobs cos I felt a bit over qualified for that...BSc computer Science and on course for a PgD and MSc in Strategic business IT but on the side I take orders at McDonalds....just doesn't sound right to me lol! (yes! I threw in the line wiv my academic achievements so u can say aaaahhhh! lol) Today however was the D-day, I was hoping my job hunting wud bear fruit today and a very succulent fruit for that matter. I'd heard about this maaadd job that pays crazy, I have a friend who's been at the job for six months and the amount of money he gets is too sick for someone his age joo! All he does is buy trainers and take chicks to movies wiv his paycheck...as me kon old pass am I suppose I'll have more responsible things to do wiv my money if I get employed right?....maybe!

They said I had to do a couple of training course for the job and take some exams afterwards before I can secure placement...today was the first stage

I sleep real late and wake up late as well, it's a habit I'm trying to stop but I only have time to watch movies and series at night so sue me. I slept kinda late last night coz I was talking to
"someone" lol. I set my alarm for 8am coz my training was at 12:30 and I'd never been to the place before so I wanted a lil' more time just in case I got lost which never really happens cos I'm like a human SatNav! Whenever I'm anxious about something I always wake up before my alarm rings, it's a phenomenom I can't explain cos on a normal day I wake up 15-30mins after my alarm rings lol. I got ready and left the house at about 10am, the place was quite far 4rm my house and when I final got to the area my watch read 11:45. Na here wahala kon start, I had effciently used Google map to find the area where the office was but I forgot to actually locate where the office was if you get me? The following few minutes see my wandering round the whole area looking for the office, I ask a couple of pple but half of them can't even speak english and they tell me "I no nothing, I not know where you talk about". Like I said before I'm a human SatNav and I just did some small geographic calculations like that and found the office lol. I go in and the Guy at the desk says I shud come back by 12:30, I look at my watch and it's 12:05 so I decide to walk round the town a bit more and see watz up! I'm walking through their market and guess wat I see in a distance exuding an alluring majesty?...A chinese restaurant...buffet for that matter!! This pple know how to catch someone ehn! the buffet was beside the window sef so if you're walking past their restaurant ur throat will nearly strangle you! I said to myself "Robby, you came here for business not pleasure...step away from the addictive oriental food" I keep on walking even though half of my body was already inside the restaurant picking a table lol. I walk into a shopping mall, window shop and run into a bouncer from my night club assistant days and we gist a bit...as usual he jokingly threatens to break my head but this time I tell him there are witnesses everywhere not like the failure of a night club where DJ sef dey come late. The time is 12:17 so I start walking back to the office. I get there at 12:25 and I meet a white guy there who's come for the exam as well. The Guy at the desk says I shud come back at 12:30 again...Now I'm wondering why he can't just register me cos it's only a difference of 5 minutes but I don't make a fuss and step outisde again, I glance at a clock on the wall and it says 11:40...how is that possible, my watch says 12:27, I pull out my phone and it says 11:42, I'm outside now and I ask a man who's walking past me wat the time is and the he just says "2..2...2...2 and keeps on walking "You are definitely going in my blog today mugu!" I say to myself. I reset my watch and wait...

I've given them my details and the training sessions begins, it takes about 1hr 30mins and then they give us the exam, it's 10 questions and 15 minutes, you are only allowed to fail one question and the pass mark is 90%..no pressure right? lol. I'm done in about 5mins and I review my answers. I submit and leave the room. After the exam one naija guy who took the exam wiv me tells me how he can't belive pple can fail this exam cos it was so simple, he says he was done in 2mins and can't believe anyone can fail this kind of exam...I don't like wen pple do that...I don't like wen pple tell you how they are going to kill an exam b4 they enter the hall and how they killed the exam after they come out, call me superstitious but I think it jinxes them...nt me o them! Another Naija guy comes out and says he's seen his score and he got 10 out of 10, he says he went in to give the examiner something and he sneeked a peek and saw her marking his paper. Someone askes him wat he wrote for number 1, he tells him, I overhear it, it's not what I wrote...DAMN IT! Someone else asks what he wrote for number 7..I stick my earphones in my ears before I get a heart attack! The examiner, a woman, comes out and asks who Robby Scribbles is..I raise my hand, she gives me my answer sheet and says I forgot to put in my National Insurance number. I write it out and check my score wen she's not looking....10 OUT OF 10 BABY!!! Who's your daddy!! lol

I'm in a conference room waiting wiv a couple of pple and I think I recognise someone 4rm church, I aks the dude if he worships at my church, he looks at me nervously and says no...all these Naija pple ehn! U ask them small question and they think you are immigrations!

Their handing out certificates and the woman doesn't give me one, I ask her where mine is and she says "I'm sorry but I was told you were not successful", I say "ehn?" First thing that comes to my mind is "Friggin Rascists...Yes Na! A broda gets 10 out of 10 and they think he cheated!" I tell her to go back and check. She comes out wiv my certificate and apologises saying the examiner didn't give her my answer sheet wiv all d others...I nearly went Anambara warrior on her ass mehn!! I find out later that the white guy who I met at the door and the naija guy who said he finished in 2mins didn't pass...I won't say it served the naija guy right but it's just more evidence to back up my theory, I felt sorry for them though cos this stuff was expensive I tell you...so expensive that failing ti can make pple mental...mebtal enuf to come in here wiv a gun and demand their money back or they start killing hostages...I'm out the office b4 my imagination gets out of hand lol!


I read something on Yahoo News about a crop circle shaped like a jelly fish, it looked real nice, wonder who did it? It's either the Aliens sending our planet a get well soon card or someone wiv a very big mathset!

14 comments:

Anonymous said...

first?!!

Sir Scribbles said...

lol...yaaaayyy 4 leggy!!! (handel's messiah soundtrack)

Anonymous said...

woah!!yes oh,nyway..first i find out u r igbo and now ur anambra too...woah!!!i hope ur not going to say that im related to u in any way oh!!!!lol.
congratulations,i hope im one of the chics wey u go carry go movie on ur paycheck!

juiceegal said...

1st!!!!!!!! Leggy u dnt count,this is my husband's blog and i do as i like...lol

juiceegal said...

Its anxiety that makes u wake up before ur alarm whenever u have an appointment,it happens to me too.
Berra go nd do kfc job,wot r u feelin like ehn???lol
U and dis chinco food addictio ehn??? nawa o
Serves the oversabi naija guy rite...hehehe
Finally congratulations,iv always known u were a smart one....lol
Sha wen u get d job...ur takin me to the movies wen ur first paycheck arrives shey uv heard.

naija shawty said...

wow, who knew u were that uhmmm...brilliant? well, the pple who make mouth, i no fit shout? cos their success is not appreciated. well, maybe i prefer the unexpected guru. u dint even tell us what field the job was in or the pay. i am happy for u sha cos man gat to survive.

what were u preparing from 8am til 10am. makeup abi?

Miss Enigma said...

I wake up b4 my alarm too, when I have an appointment.

Lol...u sent d woman back in to go and check, correct boy! See her mouth lyk u were not successful...mschew.

Goodluck!

chayomao said...

SO DID U GO TO THE CHINESE BUFFET TO CELEBRATE?

who will u be taking to the movies naa?
Forget leggy and juiceegal, i'm available anything anywhere...
lol!

P'sy-A-wana said...

guy y u dey hype urself like this u sey dey play "midfield" 4 school lol

AliceDCL said...

dont mind d woman, imagin if u hadnt seen ur score b4, *long hiss*
u and this chinese food, slow down oh.....

Sir Scribbles said...

una thank you ooo..as for those lookin for a maga to pay for a movie I suggest to go to another blog lol...how do u guyz want me to take you to the movies..I shud take my laptop into the cinema and use my webcam? I don't celebrate in the chinese restaurant unfortunately cos I was too tired and wanted to jut go home...as for Gtay u sorry excuse for a friend better mind urself ooo lol...at least I dey play midfiled unlike you wey dey defend lol

G-FUNC said...

I notice that everyone is insisting on the pay and movie tickets that they want you to buy em *me too,but he doesn't know that* but I'll rather check out the moral of the story;always set you ralarm for four hours before an interview,use google maps to search the location*like sey you go fit find aso rock for google maps kpsheewww...* and finally ensure there is a chinese restaurant close by *or mama put*

nice one bro,as always

G-FUNC said...

lool @ "...step away from the addictive oriental food..."

Dark Neo said...

Awana Why you wan start sumtin way go jeopardize us defenders ehn?.... Abeg oh!!! Hold yoursef bcos if Robby no fit catch you en go so nab me....