Watz poppin' beautiful pple of blogsville, It's Robby Scribbles here again and before we get down to business I'd just like to say something real quick. I think A woman's life is divided into three very simple phases based on her age. There's the first phase when she prefers to add digits too her age, the second phase when she thinks she's just right and there's no need to worry and the last phase where she starts to take numbers out. A 12 year old will probably tell you she's 16, a 21 year old thinks the digiits are in order and a 43 year old will tell her d cute guy at the bar that she's 32. Now let's bring today's guest out. You may remember him from posts like Tears of the Moon, Still Cave men and Only in 9ja. We went to Uni together and were in the same course as well, he's like a brother to me but still a friggin morrasucker. Ladies and Gentlemen put ur clicks together for P'sy-A-wana!!!!!
(applause)(Artquake's "Alanta")
P'sy-A-wana: GUYYYY!!! I dey feel dat song dieeee!!! ~OPEN UR ARMS LIKE SAY U WAN FLY AWAYYYYY, JUPA JU SE SIBI, JE KAJO MA SERE ~
Robby Scribbles: ~ALANTA ALANTA ALANTA, ONE LEG UP.....~
P'sy-A-wana: ~ALANTA ALANTA ALANTA, TWO LEGS UP...~
Robby Scribbles: But how dem want make we raise two legs up abeg?
P'sy-A-wana: Guy why u dey dull? na to lie down 4 floor raise leg go roof na
Robby Scribbles: LOL! Bloody tout! Sit down Jo make I ask you question...no break my chair oh, dis one wey u don dey add weight so!
P'sy-A-wana: U get mouth to dey talk anyhow na, u r a big boy now , u get ur own blog, ur own posts and even your own show...U know sey I sabi u back in d day, back wen we dey beg ATM for money
Robby Scribbles: There are plenty stupid pple inside you! Who dey beg ATM for money Oloshi...it was a joke lol! You have a blog as well don't you, why u kon dey make many noise
P'sy-A-wana: Guy What I don't understand is why many many chicks dey read ur stuff, na wetin motivate me to start blog sef but the chicks seem to be ignoring a broda u know
Robby Scribbles: Why u dey ask me dat kin question?...infact why are you asking any question at all? You are here to answer questions Oga! And please can we stick to normal, correct english please
P'sy-A-wana: Why Scribbles my good man, isn't it indubitable that I am capable of conversing in wholesome English? I was merely trying to reecreate our moments as members of tertiary education structure...why u dey dull?
Robby Scribbles:......Tout!
P'sy-A-wana: Mugu!!!
Robby Scribbles:What are you up to these days oga? We've been out of skool for almost a year so that gives you approximately 360 days of womanizing and panty chasing
P'sy-A-wana: Well, I've been working at this bank sha but e no dey pay well, Ironic isn't it? A bank not paying well! Anyway, I work hard and play harder as always. I suppose reach one fiiine babe house like that today sef but this one wey i dey waste my time wiv you that one don bust na. If you see that babe you go slap urself, she fine sote wen I first see am I grow afro on d spot
Robby Scribbles: U must be mad, na so u dey always talk, na so u dey always tell us for skool sey u dey meet one one fine girl like dat but wenever we see d girl she no dey ever fine, sometimes sef we no dey meet the girl cos there was no girl to begin wiv. You remember TT?, shey u remember her shey? you told us that she wud make all of us dump our girlfriends and consider polyandry...but when we saw her wetin happen...wetin happen I dey ask you?
P'sy-A-wana: Guy u don dull again o! She just had an accident jo...that's the only explanation for how she looked that day
Robby Scribbles: Ofcourse she had an accident...she had one wen she woke up, another one after she took a bath, one right after dressing up, two more while putting on make-up and one final fatal one wen we meet her face-to-face...If I see that girl in public I will call d police for her I swear!!
P'sy-A-wana: Guy no dey enter d babe like dat...beauty is only skin deep you know
Robby Scribbles:I know it's only skin deep...but her skin must be like 100ft deep to hide that beauty mehn! Ladies and Gentlemen we will be right back after a word from our sponsors
************************************************************************************* Do you love kids? Are you planning on having kids? Do you have kids already? If you answered yes to any of these questions then you realise the need for a steady sturdy structure of discipline and realise that children need to be modeled and directed wiv a firm hand else they derail and you find urself habouring a gun totting, knife weilding, pipe smoking 10 year old whose knocked up the neighbours daughter. There's no need to worry cos from the makers of "RAZZ-BE-GONE" and "Caller "I.V. 1.0" comes the latest in child raising technology..."Virtual Mama 2000!!!". Virtual Mama 2000 comes fully equipped with a retractable bamboo cane, cry silencer, night vision goggles, infrared girlfriend/boyfriend analyser and GPS tracker. Raising a child has never been easier and Virtual Mama 2000 is so easy to use, simply attach the VM2000 to ur child's wrist, arm, ankle or even clothes and weneva he/she goes out of line Virtual Mama will handle her business. Whether it's a kid who needs a whooping, a teenager sneaking out to a party, a son wiv a potential Obanje or a daughter that just needs to be followed around, Virtual Mama 2000 makes sure your child never goes astray. For customers living abroad the VM2000 comes wiv a special light refractor which makes her invisible to Child welfare workers, the police and nosy neighbours. Virtual Mama 2000!! cos Mama ain't raising no punk!!!
P'sy-A-wana: I feel you on that you know, but I'm not complaining dude, the more gadgets we have the less I have to do. I can't really be bothered you know
Robby Scribbles: So we've heard about your shitty job and ur imaginery chick, tells us about ur plans for the future.
P'sy-A-wana:I've got it all figured out my broda. It's like Tony Montana said "First you get the money, then you get the power and then you get the women"...women being the ultimate goal for me. Infact if I get the women first Money and power can take a hike cos nothing wud matter anymore, I'd care for her and give her all my attention.
Robby Scribbles: Ladies in the audience there's something I want you to learn, it's one of the subtle signs of a typical playa or knucklehead. If a guy romanticises about a chick who doesn't exist yet and who's idea of a relationship is like an advert for a single sucker then he is either a playa, a sap...or P'sy-A-wana
P'sy-A-wana: Guy I no like as you dey disrespect me for here oh...shey u no sey I get some pics of you, pics of you b4 u come obodo oyibo dey form posh and fly, pics of u b4 u blow, pics of you back in d days of hustling...
Robby Scribbles:Hustle'fire!! Guy I don't respond well to threats u know? me sef get pics na,! infact I go show one now...
P'sy-A-wana: AHHHHH!!! Guy I remember that exam...U lucky sey u comot the faces, if not fight for don occur here...u remember "one-two-kiss-canvas"?
Robby Scribbles: Why do u like to remind me of those things ehn, u sha like to dey talk many many pari popo. Anyway before we go is there anything else you'd like to tell our readers online
P'sy-A-wana: Yes indeed! Ladies, as you can see 4rm the picture I am a well to do broda who's on his way to the big time...but I am single...Holla at ur boy! Much love.
Robby Scribbles: Dude it was nice seeing you again even though u r still a useless pant! As ur guy I wish you the best and also a relationship that last more than the life span of a loaf of bread. Ladies and Gentlemen P'sy-A-wana!!!!!!
Thanks for joining us again Ladies and Gentlemen, next time we will have another blogger on the show wiv us, we have decided to air the show a little later than usual for this guest cos we are hoping ur kids will be asleep by then...Till next time this is Robby Scribbles saying "if you think Karma isn't a bitch then ask O.J. Simpson"
(applause)(Artquake's "Alanta")
P'sy-A-wana: GUYYYY!!! I dey feel dat song dieeee!!! ~OPEN UR ARMS LIKE SAY U WAN FLY AWAYYYYY, JUPA JU SE SIBI, JE KAJO MA SERE ~
Robby Scribbles: ~ALANTA ALANTA ALANTA, ONE LEG UP.....~
P'sy-A-wana: ~ALANTA ALANTA ALANTA, TWO LEGS UP...~
Robby Scribbles: But how dem want make we raise two legs up abeg?
P'sy-A-wana: Guy why u dey dull? na to lie down 4 floor raise leg go roof na
Robby Scribbles: LOL! Bloody tout! Sit down Jo make I ask you question...no break my chair oh, dis one wey u don dey add weight so!
P'sy-A-wana: U get mouth to dey talk anyhow na, u r a big boy now , u get ur own blog, ur own posts and even your own show...U know sey I sabi u back in d day, back wen we dey beg ATM for money
Robby Scribbles: There are plenty stupid pple inside you! Who dey beg ATM for money Oloshi...it was a joke lol! You have a blog as well don't you, why u kon dey make many noise
P'sy-A-wana: Guy What I don't understand is why many many chicks dey read ur stuff, na wetin motivate me to start blog sef but the chicks seem to be ignoring a broda u know
Robby Scribbles: Why u dey ask me dat kin question?...infact why are you asking any question at all? You are here to answer questions Oga! And please can we stick to normal, correct english please
P'sy-A-wana: Why Scribbles my good man, isn't it indubitable that I am capable of conversing in wholesome English? I was merely trying to reecreate our moments as members of tertiary education structure...why u dey dull?
Robby Scribbles:......Tout!
P'sy-A-wana: Mugu!!!
Robby Scribbles:What are you up to these days oga? We've been out of skool for almost a year so that gives you approximately 360 days of womanizing and panty chasing
P'sy-A-wana: Well, I've been working at this bank sha but e no dey pay well, Ironic isn't it? A bank not paying well! Anyway, I work hard and play harder as always. I suppose reach one fiiine babe house like that today sef but this one wey i dey waste my time wiv you that one don bust na. If you see that babe you go slap urself, she fine sote wen I first see am I grow afro on d spot
Robby Scribbles: U must be mad, na so u dey always talk, na so u dey always tell us for skool sey u dey meet one one fine girl like dat but wenever we see d girl she no dey ever fine, sometimes sef we no dey meet the girl cos there was no girl to begin wiv. You remember TT?, shey u remember her shey? you told us that she wud make all of us dump our girlfriends and consider polyandry...but when we saw her wetin happen...wetin happen I dey ask you?
P'sy-A-wana: Guy u don dull again o! She just had an accident jo...that's the only explanation for how she looked that day
Robby Scribbles: Ofcourse she had an accident...she had one wen she woke up, another one after she took a bath, one right after dressing up, two more while putting on make-up and one final fatal one wen we meet her face-to-face...If I see that girl in public I will call d police for her I swear!!
P'sy-A-wana: Guy no dey enter d babe like dat...beauty is only skin deep you know
Robby Scribbles:I know it's only skin deep...but her skin must be like 100ft deep to hide that beauty mehn! Ladies and Gentlemen we will be right back after a word from our sponsors
************************************************************************************* Do you love kids? Are you planning on having kids? Do you have kids already? If you answered yes to any of these questions then you realise the need for a steady sturdy structure of discipline and realise that children need to be modeled and directed wiv a firm hand else they derail and you find urself habouring a gun totting, knife weilding, pipe smoking 10 year old whose knocked up the neighbours daughter. There's no need to worry cos from the makers of "RAZZ-BE-GONE" and "Caller "I.V. 1.0" comes the latest in child raising technology..."Virtual Mama 2000!!!". Virtual Mama 2000 comes fully equipped with a retractable bamboo cane, cry silencer, night vision goggles, infrared girlfriend/boyfriend analyser and GPS tracker. Raising a child has never been easier and Virtual Mama 2000 is so easy to use, simply attach the VM2000 to ur child's wrist, arm, ankle or even clothes and weneva he/she goes out of line Virtual Mama will handle her business. Whether it's a kid who needs a whooping, a teenager sneaking out to a party, a son wiv a potential Obanje or a daughter that just needs to be followed around, Virtual Mama 2000 makes sure your child never goes astray. For customers living abroad the VM2000 comes wiv a special light refractor which makes her invisible to Child welfare workers, the police and nosy neighbours. Virtual Mama 2000!! cos Mama ain't raising no punk!!!
(The advertiser will not be held responsible for broken bones, fractured skulls or fatalities.)
************************************************************************************* Robby Scribbles:We're back again wiv our guest P'sy-A-wana, Dude u see the way this world is going, in my day raising a child was done wiv a real Mother nad her very real cane, these days we've got gadgets for everythings haven't we? Soon we won't be able to procreate wivout a PIN number.P'sy-A-wana: I feel you on that you know, but I'm not complaining dude, the more gadgets we have the less I have to do. I can't really be bothered you know
Robby Scribbles: So we've heard about your shitty job and ur imaginery chick, tells us about ur plans for the future.
P'sy-A-wana:I've got it all figured out my broda. It's like Tony Montana said "First you get the money, then you get the power and then you get the women"...women being the ultimate goal for me. Infact if I get the women first Money and power can take a hike cos nothing wud matter anymore, I'd care for her and give her all my attention.
Robby Scribbles: Ladies in the audience there's something I want you to learn, it's one of the subtle signs of a typical playa or knucklehead. If a guy romanticises about a chick who doesn't exist yet and who's idea of a relationship is like an advert for a single sucker then he is either a playa, a sap...or P'sy-A-wana
P'sy-A-wana: Guy I no like as you dey disrespect me for here oh...shey u no sey I get some pics of you, pics of you b4 u come obodo oyibo dey form posh and fly, pics of u b4 u blow, pics of you back in d days of hustling...
Robby Scribbles:Hustle'fire!! Guy I don't respond well to threats u know? me sef get pics na,! infact I go show one now...
P'sy-A-wana: AHHHHH!!! Guy I remember that exam...U lucky sey u comot the faces, if not fight for don occur here...u remember "one-two-kiss-canvas"?
Robby Scribbles: Why do u like to remind me of those things ehn, u sha like to dey talk many many pari popo. Anyway before we go is there anything else you'd like to tell our readers online
P'sy-A-wana: Yes indeed! Ladies, as you can see 4rm the picture I am a well to do broda who's on his way to the big time...but I am single...Holla at ur boy! Much love.
Robby Scribbles: Dude it was nice seeing you again even though u r still a useless pant! As ur guy I wish you the best and also a relationship that last more than the life span of a loaf of bread. Ladies and Gentlemen P'sy-A-wana!!!!!!
Thanks for joining us again Ladies and Gentlemen, next time we will have another blogger on the show wiv us, we have decided to air the show a little later than usual for this guest cos we are hoping ur kids will be asleep by then...Till next time this is Robby Scribbles saying "if you think Karma isn't a bitch then ask O.J. Simpson"