a week in my mind and you won't want to go home...

Wednesday, 9 September 2009

It's Mummy season...

01:23 Posted by Sir Scribbles 33 comments
So Mumsy is around...again! This post is just a recap of the 'going-downs' since she stepped into this house...by now u shud know wat to expect

Her first night here was christened with her bed collapsing in the middle of the night. I was In the living room at 2am when I heard a loud 'BANG' and 'KABOOM' from the bedroom. The next thing that echoed from the bedroom, down the staircase and into the living room was a loud "ROBBBBBBYYYYYYY!!!!" I ran upstairs and there, amongst the pile of wood, duvet and pillows was my mumsy shaking her head in acceptance that the holiday with her children had begun in the finest of ways. Seeing as I love DIY, I decided to fix the bed myself and even though Mumsy begged me to let her buy a new one I refused and the next day I drilled and hammered the bloody thing back into shape. Two nights later, like an irritating deja vu, I heard the crashing sound from the bedroom again and the same name being screamed from the bedroom, only this time it sounded more accusing than a cry for help. I ran up to the room and once again, in a heap of wood, blankets and bedsheets lay my mum preparing a 15 minute speech on how my refusal to listen to her is connected to every problem in my life and with the world at large. She actually found a way to connect my stubborness with my addiction/love of chinese food and my cousin's love for white girls, the ways she does this is still beyond me I tell you.

One fine fall morning I was crashing in the living room because when Mumsy is around we end up revamping our sleeping arrangements and I usually end up on the couch. I'm crashing on the couch and I realise that across the room mumsy is seated with my laptop staring excitedly at the screen. Initially I wasn't bothered and drifted back into sleep, then several scenarios started playing out in my head, what if she found my blog? what if she found out how many times she'd featured in my posts? what of she read my emails?, what if she reached the facebook endz? A few minutes later she answered my question by asking me a question. "Robby" she said, "How do I add you to my facebook account?". I was awake and alert immdiately because someone had just set fire to the mountain, "Your account" I asked, "Yes oh, Mrs Olu has been pestering me to join so I decided to just join the thing, how can I add you?", "Well Mummy I'm not on Facebook anymore because it ended being a waste of my time and I heard people nick youe details and use it for malicious stuff" The lie flowed from my lips marinated in guilt. "Oh okay, well it's just so that I can say I'm on facebook and Mrs Olu can get off my back". I must admit I felt guilty but what's guilt compared to my Mumsy reading and commenting on my status updates.

We all went to wedding together and weren't we looking smashing! I was proud of the Scribbles mehn, Scribbles dudes in suits and Scribble Gurls in gowns. The bride and groom are really close family friends so we were feeling a bit special because we knew almost every member of the family, I say 'we' in an attempt to disguise the fact that it was just me being subtly smug. So the newly weds did were having their first dance and it was all mushy mushy with people awwwing and oooing everywhere. Then after the ceremonial dance the song changed and so did the tempo, it was all fine and normal when they were playing the old skool song which I have no details on ATM, mumsy decided to spray money on them, a notion I thought was illegal in london and knew Popsy wud be livid over. As the oldskool tune played mumsy sprayed and when she was done and about to leave the dancefloor the DJ went mental, Yemi Sax's 'Bere mole' blasted form the speakers and I could not help myself. With no younger babes on dancefloor I seized mumsy and was surprised to see she had started boogying before me sef. It was hilarious, Mother and Son grooving on the dancefloor and my cousin, also at the wedding, went crazy with her camera. Now you'd think the DJ wud behave himself and let us leave but NO! 'Ara ga gba ndiara' followed and then 'Fokasibe' and then Kelly Handsome's 'Like play like play'. At this point I was not myself again, I was busting out different versions of yahoozee and even attempted a posh looking version of alanta, mumsy was dropping some old skool moves as much as her joints would permit, Me and mumsy were just singing along with the choruses of each song and my sis and bro were laughing their butts off at the table. It was only when we had finally returned to our seats that I realised Mumsy ad been singin along with every naija song that had come on....pesin don dey spoil dat woman sha.

Her birthday is tomorrow the 10th and as usual it's going to be quiet cos she loves it quiet. We'll probably just surprise her at 12am cos right now we are all acting like we've forgotten. You'd think that after years of pulling thr same stunt it'd get old but it hasn't, every year we surprise her at 12am and I think she likes it more than she let's us know. However, after all this I would like Popsy to come and carry his wife cos I don tire, I love this woman mehn but for that love to remain she must be at least a continent awat from me. ttyl pples!

33 comments:

Buttercup said...

1st?

Buttercup said...

WOOHOOZZLE!!! Off to read..

Buttercup said...

Hahaha your mumsy is a character! Hope you've bought her a new bed o?? All these parents wanting to join fb, ehn? I tire o! Awww @ you guys getting down on the dancefloor!

Buttercup said...

Oh, happy birthday to her in advance..

leggy said...

lol...that sounded a lot like my mum...the dancing ish...na wa oh.

Naija bad boi.... said...

3rd!!! ....yaaaay...
buttercup, ur not spamming at all oooo...at aaallllll...
lemme go read...

Naija bad boi.... said...

lmao...ur hilarious meeehn...cant begin to picture u and ur mum boogying...i can just imagine me and mine...it'll kill....lol..
ur just summin else meeehn....

Gee said...

hahhhhhha atleast for the first time in history i am top 10..shuu ur mumsy is back again?
loool...u must be havin mad fun *evil laugh*

Bubbles said...

haha
your mum is cute.!
lol
I can imagine you guys getting down on the dance floor lol

Rene said...

*tryna picture Robby and Mama Scribbles on d dance floor* hilarious! sounds like my mum.

I love this woman mehn but for that love to remain she must be at least a continent away from me....i so feel u on dt one.

Happy Birthday to Mama Scribbles (in advance) You guys must be having 'mad' fun

TaioFierce Ameen said...

lwkmd... ope u av allowed her to get a new bed oh.... reminds me of my mumc so much, she uses everi opportunity to boogey nd she probably knws more songs dan i do...lol
Happy bday to her in advance oh...

BSNC said...

lol your mum is too cute. abeg allow her buy a new bed now..


happy birthday to your mama, my mum's bday is this month too.( kai and i am broke)

chayoma said...

My mother don join FB! God help me.
Damn ur momsy sounds like my mom. lol
What a character mehn.
Happy Bday Mama Odera in advance :)

Ebony~!* said...

Hahahaahha!! its good you are keeping her active!. lol at the bed that collapsed...ahn ahn! the woman no greee sha, even facebook sef? hmmm dats a strong thing sha!

rayo said...

i'm jealous of ur rel wiv her.lol
u r such a liar, u talkd ur mom off facebook. lmao

cerberus said...

Why are mothers outshining us kids. Mine outdanced Dj Zeez at a concert LWKMD!!
i got a friend request from my aunt on FB my guy the speed wey i use take decline am ehn!!

CerebrallyBusy said...

LOL she sounds toooo much like my mum...except my mom cant join fb!

Devine said...

ha ha'ur mum is cool, ha ba now, free the bed!!!
I tell ppl cant wait 4 my wedding cus of the dance with your father bit!, as in the way me n popsie will groove eh!
Yea, its cool wen they come 4 a week, but from then on its no longer sweet!

Controversy said...

Hahaha @ momsy mehn.
Loool my own momsy to get facebook.
I cannot believe Nigerian Parents are honestly getting on this thing like it's nobody's business.

Neo said...

Mama Scribbles on the boogie! lol forget Mothers of today o, u shd see my Mum at my brother's wedding, i swear that was a dance of joy cos she thot the boy wld never settle down.

Myne Whitman said...

OH I have just fallen in love with your mum! She can dance and sing current naija songs? Go Mama, like it's your birthday! LOL.

Congrats on her birthday...

cutee said...

Lol hp u got a new bed 4 her....juz imaginin u guys on d dancefloor...add ur mama on facebook jare.lol...Happy birthday 2 ur mumcy.

Dark Neo said...

omo tell mumsy happy birthday oh! my mums was on the 7th!

David.фаворит Бога номер-один said...

ODERA!!!
LWKMD..this was funny...lol!
leat her enjoy her holliday and
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOUR MOM...i pray that God'll give her the grace and many years to eat the fruit of her labor on you, her kids....
AMEN!!!

Chi-Chi said...

Ah ah your mumsie is funky O!!

Happy Birthday to your mum, send my love : )

You this boy, so you couldn't visit my blog or ask about me.

abi? ok o

Naija bad boi.... said...

Happy birthday to mama scribbles!!!

Splash said...

funky mumsie!
that the way to go jare.
my mum rocks like she's still in her 30s.
Happy Birthday mama Robby!

Penelope...! said...

you sound like u have a great father-mother relationship...yaay! love it!
lol..ur post made me happy. :D

P'sy-A-wana said...

your mumsy is a typical ibo woman...and u say yorubas like owambe lookatchu lol.(ja is dull wivout u guys

bob-ij said...

But really how did she connect that with your cousin's love for white girls.. mums are unbelievable! And umm young man... why try to DIY?? ah ah!!

Scribbles!!! You are a real igbo boy... ara gba ndiara and like play??? looool.. I love! and I think Yemi Sax is amazing..have you heard his version of Fokasibe??

Mums are amazing,.. but I can imagine dancing with my dad more.. he always tries to raise the roof.. I'm like that's so old skool...lol

x!

kay9 said...

Yo mum must've rocked the joint back then.

cici said...

why haven't I find this blog long time?...mehn I really enjoyed reading this post remind me so much of my own....
and happy birthday to ur mom in arrears

Oreo said...

Lool..funky kinda mum! Your mum sounds cool oh.