a week in my mind and you won't want to go home...

Thursday, 3 September 2009

Make way, Buju Boy coming through...

02:31 Posted by Sir Scribbles 23 comments
Been madly occupied lately but by next week the buju boy will be back on track. However, more pressing matters brought me here today...


2 Scribblessians 3 v 14
"and it shal come to pass, after 5 score treatises, one shall come forth from the midst of the eastern men and declare a desire to lead the musers and meditators into an era of untold abundance. He will ride in the company of the men of coal skin and with a fiery eyes blazing like a furnace he shall point to the promised land and the people will be compelled to follow"

So you see people, I did not choose this, rather, it chose me. The prophecy speaks of one who will come from the midst of the eastern men (Anambara State), after 5 score treatises (100 posts), to lead the musers and meditators (Blogsville) into an era of untold abundance. It says he will ride in the company of the men of coal skin (Buju boys) and with fiery eyes blazing like a furnace he shall point to the promised land and the people will be compelled to follow (Let's go there!!!!!)

Now only one who knows the intricacies of blogging and every corner of blogsville should even come close to running for mayor right? Well Sir Scribbles cannot boast that he has ben there and done that but what I can say is Sir Scribbles has ben busy and research carried out in conjuction with The Scribbles Institute of Blog Dynamics has unearthed many factors and tendcies common in this community. Here are seven blog/blogger/reader tendenices we have uncovered.

Disclaimer: Research is still in the alpha phase but if u feel slighted by our findings then dat one na 4 ur pocket...or u can jump inside empty swimming pool.

1. Readers like pictures but loathe videos. They are helpless when it comes to viewing uploaded pics cos looking at pics is both involuntary and effortless, they are there are the human eyes is a biological amebor and can't help but see them. But with videos, the reader gets defensive and says "So you want me to watch your video? you expect me to drag my mouse cursor over to your little play button, click play, wait for it to buffer and watch 7mins of absolute nonsense? U must think I am jobless? I will not watch the video but since I'm a nice person I'll say "Nice video" when I'm commenting.

2. If you want to be loved you must first love, show love and you'll get love in return, in blogsville love is measured in comments, bloggers may love comments whether long or short, bland or elaborate but what bloggers hate is patronisind blog ads. Do not drop comments like "Nice blog, check out mine at www.xxxxx.blogspot.com". Bloggers find it quite rude and insensitive and usually end up not checking out the blog. Majority of the readers and bloggers who add the phrase "Nice blog you have here, will definitely come back" never actually come back.

3. Word verification is like snoring, the snorer/blogger never knows how annoying it is and commentators never really bring it up unless they lose sleep/comments because of it.

4. In blogsville everyone is a friend, an e-relation or a soul mate...until you share your views on sexuality, religion or discard anonymity.

5. Depending on your preferences, the fastest way to gather followers and raise comment frequency is to add an "Adult content warning to your blog" and meet the expectations by providing said adult content.

6. Anonymous bloggers must be aware of the risks of meeting up with fellow bloggers outside blogsville, keep the hook ups to a minimum and you'll be fine, meet too many and your anonymity will make no sense. In the end, you will slowly begin to lose touch with your own posts and your blog as a whole.

7. Controversy, Humour, Gossip and Sex are the Four cardinal points of a frequently patronised blog. If you currently have just 2 followers and a post-comment ratio of 3:1 then you may conisider being freakishly blunt about yourself or sensitive issues, adopting a more comical approach to your musings, talking smack about other people for no lucidly conceivable reason or giving us the 411 on any and all nookie u have gotten, are getting or intend to get.

see y'all soon I hope, i get plenty gist no worry, Make I tease una small, A few days ago....My mumsy joined facebook!

23 comments:

Yinkuslolo said...

so, when i wa sin bville gist, i was thinking of this random feature; what blogsville loves/hates. and I tot of 2, 3, 6, 7.


but sometimes, i go to some blogs, with reasonable/enlightening content and they have like 4-5 comments.

well, maybe it has to do advertising

Bubbles said...

HAHA
I LOVE 4 AND 7
so freaking true

and yes people need to keep their hookups to their damn self.!
*cough cough* N.B.B lol

juiceegal said...

All dese r so on point esp no 7.....sex blogs get like d highest comments ever...and pple dat practice no 2...one word,....annoying.
Nice one as usual..i'm impressed

P'sy-A-wana said...

due wats wrong wiv u,u set d standard now u dey fall our hand lol...nice one...

olu said...

I've been reading this blog for a minute, and I can't help but comment now, because, man, this entry is on point.

I don't blog, but I've been reading blogs forever.

**Yes, I hate videos.

**Don't know about that, because I always go back when I say so, except when I don't remember the address.

**LOL @ #3. True though.

*Word!

**Right. Aren't we all sleazy like that?!

**I wouldn't know about that.

**Very true. That also applies in real life.

Omo, your blog is the ish. Also love the fact that your updates are not sporadic.

Fanta-fucking-stic!

I'll back; I hope I remember the address. LOL!

TaioFierce Ameen said...

lol @ 5&7.... I think the human mind is generally retarded thats y 5 is true.... my popc joined FB nd i blocked him 4rm eva locating me.....lol

David.фаворит Бога номер-один said...

CHAI...see as you force me comment here na, ehn? you no serious oh, WALAHI!!! lol

that's true and you stole my idea...was thinkin about writing someting like this when i get done wiv my "SERIES"...LOL!

Devine said...

i didnt know about 3 till a minute ago
apologies to anyone i have snored on!
7 is sooooo true
n anonymous bloggers that talk nonsense dnt make sense cus they give themselves away!
n bloggers that vomit their link on ur page, like seriously! we r all hustlin' this game!!

chayoma said...

LMAO

scribblessians ke?
i don't do vids. i may watch the first 30 secs, if the thing agree load self, after that, na Nice Vid comment joo....wetin!

True comments is everything, show love to be loved ....lol. if u rub my belly i go rub urs...something within those lines :)

as for the e-reation thing, it is now over the top mehn, everyone is e-related somehow...Nawaa...
someone say E-Connections

All y'all gats to say is S-E-X and i am there....lol

as for Mayor blogsville postion, if that one exist, NO COMMENT!


LOL
(sEE as i just dey put smiley face everywhere )

Fabulo-la said...

loool!
Scribbles u r def sth else...

Rene said...

smh....u r a case

Anonymous said...

what does buju mean eh robby?

Tinu said...

kai sir scribbles!!!i know this is coming late bt congrats on ur 100th post send nkwobi my way o!!!!

Neo said...

5 is so so true!

tunrayo said...

....i've run out of all the ways to tell you how crazy you are. now they have confirmed that im crazy in my office cos im laughing for no apparent reason.

Naija bad boi.... said...

5 znd 7 r soo true...lol...
Scribbles, y do I get d feeling u were directing some of them at me eh????
Bubbles, bubbles...but u know I luv u..
*glances at rene*.*wink*wink*

I removed my last post cos of u ooo...so y r u callin names naw...lol

Penelope...! said...

4 and 7 mesmerize me! lol

BSNC said...

i know i am late, but happy 100th post :)


lol i feel you...

how you dey.

GiDiPwInCeSs said...

nice one!!! you couldn't have put it better!!!!
ps : i hate word verifications!!! too much stress jare!!!

bob-ij said...

This my brief hiatus threw me off.. but I'm not anonymous now...and I don't talk about any of those 4... ah I'm not a member of blogsville. But really videos are not the best...lol and the link thing is a bit..ummm oh well!

nice post...lol (just wanted to re-emphasize your nice video point)... heehehe

x!

Controversy said...

See i've been a member of blogsville for only 3 days and I can say i noticed all this already.
Dayum so true sha. But i have really fallen in love with bloggin but unto more important stuffs..
Check out my blog "CONTROVERSY" lmao.. hahaha i mean since u are on the subject of advertisin, why not do some shameless advertising while @ it ehn?

Sir Scribbles II said...

Yinkus: maybe it is, infact i knwo it is cos in blogsville pple have to advertise thei rblogs either vehemetly or subtly to get readers lol

Bubbles: abge make u nd NBB carry u gist go one corne roh lol. NBB won't u leave dem alone

juiceegal: sometimes i wish i opted for a sex blog rather than this random humour thing lol. U r impressed? that's all dat matters mehn

P'sy: U dey mad, i go soon pour u hot water, maga!

olu: Thanks mehn, glad u enjoyed it sha

Taio: LOL! as for my mumsy I have decided to live a lie and tell her i'm no longer interested in Fb

DAvid: really? I guess great minds think like robby lol

Devine:lol@ hustling, shey na hustle we dey hustle? me no knwo oh

chayoma:LMAO I'm glad u liked this post oh, one can never have enough smileys

Fabulol-la: why thank you, i'll take dat as a compliment

Rene: I know lol

Anon: Buju is a jamaican term for black man lol

Tinu: Nkwobi, my goodness woman do u think I wud celebrate dis occasion with that, oriental food is teh wya forward

Neo: LOL! ofcourse it is

tunrayo: LOL! awww i appreciate ur lack of decorum when reading my posts.

NBB: u dey mad, why u go dey think like dat ehn, or is it true?

Penelope: aww thanks

BSNC: I'm gud oh! Thabks for the holla

Gidipwincess: I knwo it's supposed to help against automated comments but seriosuly wat the heck!!!

bob-ij: yeah u r, tbh I wanted to add ur genre of blog to the list. no need to finish teh sentence i'll finish it for you, the link thing is annoying

controverysy: na u r cool, you dropped a very elaborat comment so I'll def be checkign you out

sunnyside said...

Lol
Nice blog, i ll definitely be back..... or will i ?

check out my blog xxxx.blogspot.com. Lmao