a week in my mind and you won't want to go home...

Saturday, 11 July 2009

96hrs of Nuclear activity....

15:26 Posted by Sir Scribbles 31 comments
Ladies and Gentlemen His Royal Awesomeness is back!!! Do I have Gist? maybe...!! lol. I missed u guyz mehn but I had to indulge in a nuclear powered weekend else I run mad here biko! How will I describe the last four days? There's a theory that for every moment of pleasure we have someone is having an equal amount of pain somewhere else. If na so then in the last four days some poor sucker somewhere just got soaked in corrosive acid and had his fingers, toes and nipples nibbled by canivourous rats before being bathed in hot Kerosine and burnded to death with a candle...morbid shey? But u get the picture...now where do I start sef....

Friday: Landed in Leeds and the first thing I notice is that it's just a town for clubbers, everywehre you look there's a club, I swear they have them adjacent, opposite and beside each other...I wonder how pple choose which one they should go to...probably roll a dice or do eba eba lol. Walking on the street is like being stuck on a Dj's turntable...you just keep hearing different songs as you keep going...I swear I was on the street and there was this Techno song coming 4rm one club...3 steps later nd it's Akon 4rm another club, a few steps more and it's some Latino ish!...You can just stand in d middle of the street nd u'll get the same clubbin experience. The only thing more common than clubs in Leeds is Mcdonalds, the little hubs of obesity and heart disease are everywhere...you can't walk peacefully wivout being molested by their neo signs nd brightly coloured furnishing...No amount of shine-shine can hide ur aim to dominate d world by making us too fat too fight McDonalds!!!!!!!!!!

Have I told you guyz that I love Horror movies? Well I do, I love them to the point where it's more comical than horrific for me. There was a point in my life when I only read Stephen King books...my Popsy thot it was disturbing. Anyway I love Horror movies and I went to see Drag me to hell, btw this movie does not in any way or manner represent me intended afterlife holiday vacation spot. It's a hell of a horror movie, reminded me of the oldskool horror flicks like Exorcist and Poltergeist...freaky stuff but funny as well. Haven't seen a decent horror movie in ages, d last one I saw was The haunting in Conneticut and that one made me feel like sueing someone for wasting my time and taking my money as well...plus I took someone...just made it even more painful.

Saturday: Went to see Bruno, this is a short list of pple who shouldn't see this movie, The homophobic, The squeamish, The comical reserved, The conservative, Easily offended, Contentious, ill-hmuored, Sensitive, irritable...u dey grab shey? It's just a friggin hilariously evil movie lol. You know you shouldn't be laughing at this but you just can't help urself...Sacha Baron Cohen is just a nutcase. After watching it I decided to watch "Borat"...I swear I don't know which movie was more hilarious...I repeat, if you are squeamish or easily offended DON'T SEE THE MOVIE OOOOOOOO!" I walked out of the movie thinking "It just feels wrong to laugh at this...but it's was soooo damn funny!!" Do not take ur children, relations older than you or younger than you by 5 years and in some cases don't take ur significant other...dis movie is like taking Heroine knowing that it's bad 4 you but enjoying d high nonetheless.

Sunday: I think I forgot to mention that the second reason why I went to Leeds was to tidy up my friggin inconclusive Love life wiv someone. There's dis Girl u see, we are in a situation, we've been friends for a friggin long time, we like each other, we are too far apart. I went to handle my biz and I cudn't...we cudn't, Like I said we were having such a good time that discussing something as dullin' as "Let's just be friends" was just not an option. In conclusion, we decided to "Go wiv the flow" wateva dat means...sounded like a gud idea 48hrs ago..now I don't even know what it means lol. So I was wiv her throughout....let ur mind wander a bit...a bit further...no that's too far back up a bit lol.

You know ur boy cannot go thru a whole day wivout something odd happening talk less of four days. Well in the space of four days we got stopped and searched by the police, I was nearly vomitted on by a 6 year old , I heard one of my friends got kicked out of buffet cos he sat there eating 4rm 8am till around 3pm, I finally understood why I love black chicks lol, I realised why the middle finger conotes "F@ck U" (my naivety astounds me sometimes), She looked at me and...jizzed in my pants lol

Now I'm back nd it feels like I went to chill in Pluto only to come back nd find out earth is still in deep shit. I only used d internet once in four days nd I totally blocked out any source of info only to get back home nd shit was just waiting 4 me. Swine Flu is still forming gangsta disease, I have projects due, A lunatic was arrested for walking down d streets naked claiming he was a Terminator sent back 4rm d future, I have a depleted bank account, Obama went to Africa to tell us what we already know but refuse to do, i have friggin pointless english exam...d wahala plenty! Out wiv d awesome weekend nd in wiv ass-biting wahala right? lol

btw "Nuclear" nd "Awesome" are in and "Tight" and "Cool" are out...courtesy of CC...

31 comments:

Nice Anon said...

How can your friend sit there for that long? I would have kicked him out too. That is waaay too long!

I like it when things are defined rather than all that going with the flow mess. Oh well Hope it works out for the both of you.

Nice Anon said...

I am the first person to comment since Saturday? Odikwa n'mma? I feel a tad scared screaming first

Fabulo-la said...

ok Nice I will claim the spot then...
FIRSTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!

Next time Nice claim it.
lol

yinkuslolo said...

nuclear? really nuclear!!

Fabulo-la said...

Go with the flow ke?...
OK O! That almost NEVER works...but im nt a bearer of bad news..
oHHHHH I want to see Brunooooooo tooo!!
lol @ stopped and searched??
lool Were you cupped by any chance?
loool!

yinkuslolo said...

i knew it was a woman that led u there.

so, what innocent crime did u commit? def not underaged stizz bah?

nameless said...

what flow again??
hope u guys work something out tho
x

UnderCover07 said...

Stopped and searched? Wetin happen?
8am to 3pm? Did they jst release him from starvation?...shooo!

Hmmm "go with the flow"...things get complicated when they are not defined o; cos u dnt knw when one thing u do or dnt do is not in line with the flow... Neways, hope u guys work something out, and u r both happy.

Welcome back!

Lady X said...

LOOOL
Scribbles you wont kill me o!
So here I am in the school Library reading your blog innocently expecting to laugh of course. When you said there's clubs everywhere in Leeds I thought to myself perhaps you don't even need to enter the club to have fun. You could just stand on the street and dance alone hehe! And about the fat people hahahaha I just remembered one video on Youtube of one obese woman check it out

http://www.facebook.com/ext/share.php?sid=104207098446&h=IGrpQ&u=pXCzl&ref=mf

And then I remembered one horror movie I watched called 'The Cottage' I swear that movie is graphic but when they were cutting up people see me and my friends laughing. People were just looking at us like hmm see these disturbed black people.

Tha tale of the matter is when you said your friend was eating from 8am till 3pm I burst out laughing and everyone turned to look at me. Probably thought I was on crack. I thought the laughing thing was over till you now wrote there was a naked man claiming he was Terminator. I just had to get up and leave the library. I'm now back and typing this comment. People are still looking at me. Maybe they're wondering if I'm going to get up and shout 'Obama y'all!' or something. Maybe I should humor them hahaha

Lady X said...

This has got to be the longest comment anyone has written on your blog.
Yes!!!!

G-FUNC said...

Na only this one you see bring come back to write for us................Kpshewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!!!! lol

We want more

Good to see you enjoyed your vac so much your vocabulary has changed

P'sy-A-wana said...

duuuuuuuude seems u had a wait for it "weekend" lol...and of course u got searched, (whisper)they heard bad baby sent u a package so they r tailing u lol...and dat ur friend dat got kicked out sounds familiar, r u sure it wasn't u...anyhows men just take it easy, i heard the martians planning an attack next week...P.S no go dull wiv dat babe, define the shizzle

Qube The Wordsmith said...

Dude u r a riot!!!

naked terminator,am to pm buffet...

GNRS2S

Sir Scribbles II said...

@Nice Anon: I was so ashamed when I heard that ehn, shey d boy wanted to fall our hand. Way to long yes! My sister defining this ish is too hard on it's own i tell you, the constraints are too much. Lol! u rnt use to being first shey lol

@Yinkus:Very Nuclear...in ways I cannot blog about *wink*

@Fabulo-la: Noo i wasn't cupped jo! lol. However I was tempted to bribe the man lol. Going wiv d flow is a way of saying if you meet someone else then u go carry on.

@nameless: Don't worry dis boy is more rational than naive, we know wat ae are doing

@Undercover: Well we aren't in a relationship cos there are too many constraints, we are just being very optimistic and realistic at the same time hence going wiv d flow

@Lady X: I are close but I think culture Cynic is the current holder of that award lol. Abge no crase becos of me oh take am easy biko lol. Mehn dat video is disturbing...how do pple even let themselves get to that stage

@G-FUNC: U jusy dey vex sha..wetin happen guy, of which i didn't tell you but I liked that you rvideo oh! u knwo d one

@P'sy: dem think sey i dey hide bad baby for boot shey lol. guy no worries ur boy cannot dull

Sir Scribbles II said...

Qube: thanks mehn! Abeg forgive my ignorance but wat's "GNRS2S"

Naija bad boi.... said...

dude....welcome back meeehn....but u sha...woman no go kill u ooo...so u go leeds go see woman abi??? u come dey lie say na one of d reasons??? amadioha wipe ur mouth...msschheeeewww...btw...so leeds is dat cool, meeehn i passed up on leeds for liverpool ooo..lemme know now ooo if i shuld go and dust my admission letter...lol...
and dats all u did in 4 days?? 4 days???!!! u bera come and write more tori...nonsense...
and we all know twas u dat got kicked out of d buffet jooo

Gochi said...

Seriously a naked man/terminator what city is this?

Dude what time does buffet's open and seriously 7 hours did he have a bowl or something?

tunrayo said...

Welcome back!!! greatly missed you were :)

Havent outgrown my horror phase yet. I just LOVE horror. Almost all what i read is stephen king. I'm in love with him. STill building my collection. My mother thinks i'm seriously disturbed.

'going with the flow' means that what ever happens on both ends you're gud. just hope ure mentally prepared for that.

CultureCynic said...

hahahahahahahahah CC authorized NUCLEAR!!!!! hahahahahahaaha how nuclear of you to use it and cite me...ehehehehehehee

and yes CC holds the award for longest comment/epistle ever written on a post....yay me!!!\



NUCLEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i will be back

CultureCynic said...

ur friend is a grredy somebody, i wont even pretend he is not NIgerian cuz he is....longer throat.....he will be in the toilet for dayz......

ahahahahahaahahaha i am yet to see bruno, was gonna on friday but sumfin more NUCLEAR happened so i went with the flow....hopefully your flow doesn't carry you over to the wrong stop. WRONG WAY!......

make sure u define the lines o biko, u know sey u have a weak heart, before she plays brazillian futbal wiv it!

you got serched??? ahahahahhahaahahaha u r a church boy the only thing the probably found in your possession will be a half sipped satchet of Caprison. lol...am not even worried, chances of u ever getting arrested is negative 25.

i mished u a teeeeny teeny bit o..don say CC doesnt love you

Sir Scribbles II said...

@Naija Bad boy: dude I don't know much about the Unis sha, but I sha knwo sey Leeds na clubs just full everywhere. And I no fi talk everything wey i do guy...pple are watching lol

@Gochi: I didn't get the town but his name is Bill Merit, apparently he had smoked too much weed lol. I swear I cudn't believe it wen I heard it..d boy fall my hand

@Tunrayo:Finally someone who gets wat I'm talking about, going wiv d flow is a licence to kill you know lol. I love Horror movies ehn, you shuid see d movies it's kool

@CC: You know we share a special love CC so why are you joshing me like dis...half sipped pack of caprison LMAO...u r becoming a lil' scribbles in ur own way u know...nd me soft heart...U neva jam! Little do u know my dear...very little lol

NaijaBabe said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
NaijaBabe said...

Shet mehn. Johnny Drama ain't gat nurrin on u. Not even one atom sized bit. Your life is full of one incident or the other. But mehn I enjoyed that. Good enough to make up for the long absence. I won't lie I missd u small sha. Just a little bit small

So erm my mind wandered and kinda got stuck somewhere. Pls come and drag it out of this dirty smellng gutter

Rene said...

LMAO!!!
wot did u expect would happen to your bank account before? Which one is go with the flow? what does it even mean?
My mind ws wandering too far until u made me force it to go back:(
I've forgotten what else I wanted to write...lol

Sir Scribbles II said...

Naijababe: Okay I've got the detergent and bleach all we need to do now is soak ur head in hot water to wash out the filth lol. I have accepted that on a weekly basis crazy shit must happen around me...although I think It happens to everyone and I just like to write about it. You only missed me small...i am disappointed lol

@Rene: My sister goin wiv d flow means if things don't work out we cannot feel guilty. SO it happens to you too. You want to post a comment and it just vanishes from your mind lol. Oh nd ur mind shud not wander to far jo!

NaijaBabe said...

Hahaha. The damage this picture has done, it has passed bleach o. U let my mind run amok and then you offer me bleach? Don't make me release torrents of vexation on u ( you suppose bow right there!!!)

I'm trying the 'make him jealous' rule by saying 'small'. If I told u the truth, I can't handle all the fronting that will follow

Sir Scribbles II said...

@Naijababe: Who send u message biko, I sipmply said let ur mind wander, some pple wander out into the back yard, some wander into the attic...who sent you to wander into the street and fall into a gutter biko? ...torrents of vexation...i like it!!!

NaijaBabe said...

Seeen. Instead of U to offer me vim and that naija brush, you've decided to forsake me. No worries. God dey

Sir Scribbles II said...

Naijababe wetin na? Mehn wat have u been thinking biko? Vim ke and wisdom tooth brush? I hope I still have all my clothes on in dis gutter you have found urself in

NaijaBabe said...

Haha that's funny. I don't think I want to tell you o. Sorry.
But I actually meant the wooden brush with yellow bristles

G-FUNC said...

Dey there dey embarrass me for public
as in now to show my face for blogville go be wahala
you don fall my hand scribbles nwa nnem lol