a week in my mind and you won't want to go home...

Wednesday, 29 July 2009

No more play play....

11:12 Posted by Sir Scribbles 33 comments
*serious face* Oya everybody look sharp! Put on ur thinking caps and if you don't have one you can rent one 4rm Leggy or CC cos it's time to brainstorm!! We no dey play 4 here oh! I have a few observations and would like ur logical inferences please...dis na serious matter so no smiling.

Abeg can someone explain to me why Sesame street as been lying to us for decades? How? The Cookie monster is how! He never really eats the cookies does he? NO! he pretend sto eat them but just breaks them into lil pieces and litters them all over the floor. I just realised the cookie monster is all talk and no game, he's got no cookie munching skills and it saddens me to think millions of kids and adults believe he's got some insatisiable craving for cookies when he's nothing to show for it. Sure he talks a big game but no one can handle that many calories...no one!!

I have a new follower and as is the normal tradition I went over to hers to say hi and all dat, a few minutes after arriving at hers I knew something was different. I'd like y'all to take a stroll over to Calc Musings and see if you can figure out what's going on there. I tried to form smart pikin and decipher her many "unique" musings but it reminded me of a riddle I saw on Yinkuslolo's blog....the one I so cofidently ran away 4rm. I really want to leave a comment there but I was afraid of sounding either like an iliterate or an ignorant sycophant. But make nobody go comment first on any post there ooo...I've got dibs on all of them shey una dey hear me so?!!

I've noticed something very disturbing, dis time it's not about transsexuals o! It's name is SKINNY JEANS. If I ever wear a pair of skinny jeans I'd like u all to revoke my blogsville pass and ban me and my children 4rm ever scribbling again. Funny enuf it looks good on some dudes (can't belive I just said that...sounds sooooo gay) but as for me and my thighs we will serve the roomy pants thank you. I've got a friend who wears dem on d regular and weneva i walk down the street wiv him I can see pple straing at both of us nd knowing british folk this is wat they'd be thinkin "Effin' puffs, walk down our street will you? Oi!, gets ur soding, spear chucking, rear ending selves off our street!!!"

To the ladies in the house, if you have an older brother ehn and he's being overbearing, overprotecting nd a general pain in the posterior I have a solution for you...it's called Deal wiv it cos that's how we were designed. Why do u make it hard for us to be overprotective sef, it's hard enough to do without y'all having cloak and dagger boyfriends around but y'all just want to make d job even more tasking don't you? Why i ask why? I have a sister, just one, no replacement o, just one, God hasn't sure I could handle multiple so he gave me one sister..sue me 4 wanting to blind any half-wit who tries to hit on her...especially wiv pick up lines....infact don't sue me, jail me cos homicide is inevitable.

Barney the dinosaur obviously has pedophilic tendencies, it's either that or he's gay and for those of you who just thot "How could Robby say that?" well I've got gist for you, obeservations, facts and some friggin ingenius guesses as well. When next you see the purple creature ask him this, how come he wears purple all the time wiv a hint of lemon green to ginger things up? I'm no paleontologist but I have a fairly vivid picture of what dinosaurs look like, they have hard rigid skin not soft purply highly exfoliated skin, they have long fangs and monstrous sized canines not Dr. 90210 chisled molars and they don't sing love songs to lil' kids. Shey Barney didn't see his mate Godzilla, Godzilla wasn't even a dinosaur, she was just a lizard who drank too much fermented Kaikai. The last evidence of Barney's child-loving traits was hiding in plain sight and this one no be the Da Vinci code, at the beginning of every show Barney is "small" then wen the kids come to play he grows "bigger" then when they leave he gets "small" again....u don't need Dan Brown to tell you that at some point during the "I love you" sing aloud/serenade Barney, the prehistoric R-Kelly, had a "Dinogasm".



33 comments:

Quaggar said...

yup.. first!

Quaggar said...

Ok dude, seriously... cookie monster doenst eat all dem cookies? Noooo!!!!

lol

Naija bad boi.... said...

lmao...robby ur crazy......lol@ barney being a pedophile meeeehn....am feelin u joooo.....
nice one bro.....
so r u saying its only leggy and CC that can think ehn??? people hear him ooooo...nonsense...mscheeeewwwwww

NaijaBabe said...

Naija bad boi...dont mind him. Can someone please say preferential treatment!!!
pshew!!!

But please tell me you didnt just REALIZE it? but Barney is on a next level sha...the dude has always been dodgy to me. But his own has not reached the teletubbies! Those goys either have G.A.Y tattoed to their foreheads or they are outright paedos.

tunrayo said...

the cookie monster had you fooled too, at least i discovered what a fraud he is before you did.

i support jo, barney's just plain weird. faggot! lol.

and more LOL!!! at godzilla...the lizard who drank fermented kaikai

...dude youz crazy. nice

Naija bad boi.... said...

and meehn...just checked out the calc musings....i couldnt comment on there ...so ama comment right here....
"meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeehn!!!!!"..lol... and she's about the simple little things??? noin little in those meeehn....lol...ummm...hope she doesnt come on here oooo

Tay-mee said...

LMAO..Scribbles where do you get these your arguments from sef. Cookie monster doesn't eat cookies?? seriously dude..haha.

People like you are the reason I love blogs ville mehn..lol

Tinu said...

and i thot we were going to do some serious thinking here o!!!
I did stroll over to calc musing!!
no comment!
oh well
u just destroyed the way I feel abt cookie monster he does eat those cookies! dnt even try dissing elmo!!just giving u a head up!!!

NaijaBabe said...

erm she lost ma on the 1st 2 lines

CultureCynic said...

* blank stare@ side comments*>>(in proper lawyer voice) RELEVANCE?!?!??


but on a more serious note u invoked me to come and talk about cookie monster, so we will talk about cookie monsters??? ngwanu let me take a gander arit! cookies are sweet, monsters are not so maybe the name did him in. they say you are what you eat non?, maybe the reason u see the crumbles instead of seeing him actually eating them is because he stays true to his monster ways and eat what monsters eat...real monster food, like little unattended , defensless little kids.. Never met one in real life, but i can imagine that real monsters dont eat cookies.. if you brought up big bird maybe my thinking cap would have been tickled silly....BAM!!


oooo and Barney is not gay, becasue that wld be obvious, purple is not a gay colour in the same way that pink is not. Barney is a plush stuffed animal, i dont know if you know this, but i found out that there is actually a person in it, it is a prop like a costume....you didnt know that did you??? yup didnt think so. So Barney is a phony yo, he is not even a real dinoseur!! i find it kinda funny actually that he never ages, i wonder how many purple suits he goes thru every year...how much do you think it costs...and how come i have never seen anyone dressed up as Barney for Halloweeen...these are more important questions Robertford, very important and i need answers ...

if Barney is a pedophile then shame on you all for letting him get away with it...i actually feel the need to belt out a Barney ballad, but i fear your stans will be 'unimpressed'....

o @ *i will be off somewhere dropping off my water drinking cup...moreover my thinking cap needs airing out....:P

Fabulo-la said...

LOL!! Dude u r right on with Barney oo!
And as for those tele tubbies? Ive always known they were pedophilic hynotists. How come nobody else can see that?
lool
Lemme not start with all them silly disney cartoons. Cinderella was a bloody housegirl u kno??
lol

KuiDee said...

LOL! I don't know how to defend myself sef. But that blog was for class ooo!!
You should be looking at the other more recent blog. lol.

…btw I also wondered by CM never actually ate the cookies. :/ But you have to admit he "chewing" style was entertaining …somewhat. :)

ChinChin said...

Lool! You know I've been wondering about the cookie monster too.. I noticed bout the cookie crumbling business... I guess that why little kids end up putting food on the floor and thinking they ate it...

And I've been preaching that Barney word forever ... glad sm1 else noticed!

Temite said...

Seriously, YOU are NOT serious. At all....

chayoma said...

The Barney issue got me cracking! at first i was at his defense, seeing as purple is my fave color, but as i read on, LWKM!
i am with Naijababe,
teletubbies is the height of plain animosity! period
the Godzilla comment? where do i even start self! lol. maybe i shld feed a lizard kaikai make i see this kain wonder with my own korokoroo eyes !

But eh, make no boy come my front with skinny jeans...i am the only one allowed to wear such!
And... i thank you.
My drink and my two cents!

(Gosh, i'm just high from reading this post. Oh what good fortune today has in store for moi)

Rene said...

LMAO...that barney shit is funny as hell
never watched sesame street...i'vealwys hated it.... so I can't comment...
I even thought you were going to propose something about all them over bearing brothers...biko? I can't deal with it o!
checked out the calc musings and i was lost on the title of the first post....maybe when i take something strong i'll be able to read it....forgot! don't drink again...

rayo said...

barney, peadophile? lmao...
i kip wishin i had a big bro, lyk seriously...

~Chocolate and Caramel~ said...

lol...i HATE seeing skinny jeans on guys c'mon ot every one can get away with that jo! it even has a dorky look on some ladies not to think of guys abeg!.. and wats with this barney being gay? free the child entertainer jo hes jus a happy little lad! LOL and PS: y are brothers soooo protective?

leggy said...

i knew he didnt eat them..i used to tell daddy all d time....nd barney...i knew there was something really fishy about that dude...doesnt ever wanna grow up...always wt kids..kinda lik mj huh?

nameless said...

lol! i cant even understand what she is saying -_-

leggy said...

and wat d heck is that girl's major...?im studying chem engine and i couldnt even make head or tail...
simple little things?
who is she kidding?

Naija bad boi.... said...

@Leggy..be nice..she's around ooooo..lol

Lady X said...

I don't know bout Barney but I've always suspected that Baby Bop!
She's a teeny weeny bit too flirtatious! She wiggles that short tail of hers a lil too much to the left and right!

Lady X said...

Perhaps she wants Barney to hit it...
Who knows...On top of that blanky she's always with...

Sir Scribbles II said...

@Quagger: Sorry to burst u bubble mate but yeah he's a fraud

@NBB: I no sey that sentence go cause controversy, why u dey vex na? okay u sef get thinking cap happy now?

@Naijababe: lol...wen i typed that I knew it's cos a lil unrest..okay sorry to both of you. U have a thinking cap as well and I didn't want to tell pple to rent it cos u guys are so articulate it's obvious u always have them on lol. I saved the teletubbies analysis for another post..those ones are just sick loll

@Tunrayo: well thank you my dear, u r crazy too lol. I wa watching an episode of american dad nd it just hit me that the cookie monster was a fraud...

@Tay-mee: awwww thanks dear that's d sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me in blogsville, aside Leggy, CC, naijashawty et all saying they love me lol

@Tinu: lol...I can imgine u wiv a thinking cap on nd a disappointed face lol. As for Elmo...u just gave me an idea. KuiDee is a special person wiv a special blog, I'm not going there anytime soon though, she has another blog if u care to visit

@CC: ur won will always be different, u just like to turn my posts into hotspots for controversy even after i gave u props by telling pple to rent their thinking caps 4rm u..why? although 4 some weird reason i see sense in ur what u r saying...maybe it's the pineapple juice talking lol

@Fabulo-la: ahhhh u need to read the following posts my dear
http://royalscribblesdeux.blogspot.com/2009/06/spoof-reality-check.html, and
http://royalscribblesdeux.blogspot.com/2009/06/part-2-spoof-reality-check.html...u will be enlightened even more

@KuiDee: Babe wat r u studying sef, are u even studying or are u inventing some new strand of mathematics. I swear I stared at that blog tryin got figure out at least one line there nd my head began to hurt lol. Don't worry I'll visit ur other crib ASAP.

@ChinChin: LOL..i like how u said "No, I'm not a show" funny stuff. Barney is just a phoney but I'm on to him nd his tellytubby cohorts.

@Temite: seriously I am, d sooner we open our eyes to this indecency on our TVs the better for our children lol

@Chayoma: so u see my point, Barney is a child-lover and skinny jeans are a no no lol. Glad I cud be of serviice me lady

@Rene: well u r one of the few who got away, I use to watch sesame street alot but now i feel like those were wasted years cos I was lied to all that time. Do u know why big bird never laid an egg...

@Rayo: u want a big bro so u can drive him crazy wiv paranois like my sister intends to do to me? lol. the work is not easy u know

@c&c: we r so protective cos we don't want freaks like barney barking up the family tree lol. we r designed that way my dear there's no way to answer that question wivout sounding like the mini-CIA lol...as for Barner, u want me to free him...r u a fan?

@Leggy: lol she says it's for class oh! me I don't know what they're teaching her i swear cos i tried to grab even a single sentence but i cudn't. Fishy is an understatemen for Barney's operations.

@nameless: I cudn't understand shissy too...d babe is on another level

Sir Scribbles II said...

@Lady X: lol..now u r thinking like sir scribbles, we have tobreak free from all d shackles of deception the media has chained us wiv nd realise that barney is a child lover, the teletubbies are racist and sesame street is just filled wiv liars whether it's oscar or big bird

Bubbles said...

LOL.!
you made me giggle
and I agree
Barney def has pedophiliac potential
I always thought he did
love the blog
following it asap
:)

Dark Neo said...

Ode You don mad finish ...
prehistoric R-Kelly????
DINOGASM!?????
infact I dey free you, u're sanity is too far gone...
BTW Funniest shit ever!

Sir Scribbles II said...

@Bubbles: welcome to the royal scribbles nd as u may have already noticed we keeps it satire up in here lol..

@Dark Neo: thanks bro..me sef no sey i don dey crase small small

P'sy-A-wana said...

dont blame the cookie monster he cant keep his hands out the cookie jar lol...as for u and barney na una know u must still be sore after all these years, i dont blame u sha "playing" wiv barney must be pretty tough "wink wink" know wat i mean...

Neo said...

I've been scarred for life, i'm like totally addicted to Barney! i cant look at him the same way ever again!

Neo said...

I've been scarred for life, i'm like totally addicted to Barney! i cant look at him the same way ever again!

Ms. 'dufa said...

LWKMD! Really! Dinogasm??? Your mind has really been to many places!