a week in my mind and you won't want to go home...

Wednesday, 10 June 2009

Scribblenation: Presented disjointed...

03:14 Posted by Sir Scribbles 32 comments
Have I told you guyz how much I love you guyz, not like a celebrity's love for his fans (no pun intended) more like an adopted child's love for his foster home, una dey read my rants, my fluctuations through lunacy and insanity and still come back, some pple dey even follow my blog...u don't think I'm mad shey?...una too much sha!!! except Gtay or P'sy wateva...u r dead to me lol. As usual Scribblenation is a collection of some random thoughts and memories..

I went to see one of my many Uncles in this country, in his house we got talking and he told me he wanted to learn this "computer" of a thing, I told him it was good cos the everything is going digital these days, I was about to switch to IT mode and start lecturing him when I just felt I shud ask him something else..."Uncle, how far have you even gone wiv the computer learning sef?" He replies "Where do you put it on?"

Apparently My Lil, sister has a blog, and she has banned me from looking for it let alone reading it. However, she reads mine...dat's not fair right? I'm going to hack into her lappy and find the url...maybe take a look at her browser history as well...see if she's still daddy's lil' girl lol. Do you think I shud do it or just free the small girl? Will I even want to know wats in it?...Imagine if I open it an d the first thing I see is an adult content warning...I go just phone mumsy sharp sharp!

London Underground went on a strike today, they say it'll be a 48hr long strike and no tubes or trains will be running throughout, it started at 7pm yesterday and at 4pm today I saw animals in the clothes of men, today the whole london became a level playing ground for commuters. Old and young, tall and short, diasbled and fully fit were force to rely on barbaric measures to get from one place to the other, I got elbowed by an old woman today, My sister got hit in the knee wiv a trolley, I saw a good-looking suit wearing, possibly banker guy do an olympic style triple jump just to get into the bus...it was chaos!!!

Butt cracks have become the new cleavage, a broda can't go 4rm his house to the supermarket wivout catching a glimpse of micro-porn! Very soon crotchless jeans will be in style and together wiv cleavage and butt cracks they'll be no need for playboy magazines and parental guidance on TV lol

I think I've cried for just two films in my whole life, Passion of the christ was one, In pursuit of happiness nearly turned on the waterworks but I stood firm...the second film to make me cry was "Going bananas" LOL! Yes I know it's a comedy, I was young and naive don't blame me, I still remember the scene that made me cry sef...When the kid was on eth boat leaving the monkey behind on the harbour...I just felt they'd been through too much for the guy to abandon the monkey lol!

An old flame came to visit a few days back...how old is dis flame? 4yrs old, the last time I saw her was four years ago, we had a thing, we had a connection, we got close, she didn't want to date a close friend, I shud have closed d deal b4 she threw me in the friendz zone, she had to leave coz her parents were posted outside d country, We're both in the UK now, We went to see a movie, we had a moment again, she's gone back to skool outside london, I'm still in london...I miss her...but not like that...kind like a "now I understand why I was so sprung back then" kinda way!

I hate hearing myself on the phone or on a recording...I think I sound stupid and cartoonish, Sometimes I record myself talking and when I play it back to myslef I feel like swallowing my tongue, maybe that's why I prefer texts to phonecalls...maybe I'm just weird!!

I love watching wiv my dad but my Mum is the more entertaining partner of the two, she's totally ignorant of the sport but there's nothing more entertaining than an Igbo woman, who knows nothing about football, giviing football analysis every 2 seconds...in Igbo! She says stuff like "Who is that one running everywhere? O' riri Amosu football (Did he eat a football demon)", another classic statment is "Ogini n'eme ebe'a why n'achoghi nye ndi ozo ball ka ha gba? (Watz happening there, why doesn't he want to give the other pple d ball to play") and "Bia e huru ka o si we manye elu we piakasi dat ball n'ime net (Come did you see d way he jumped up to smack dat ball in the net")...She's just a character!!!

I've noticed that since I came to this country I've had shitty luck wiv chicks, it's either age, educational level or location dat gets in my way...I'm a nice guy now!!! Wat did I do to deserve this?

No plans for summer and this is the second time I am saying it, can someone please get a clue and show some initiative lol


Sir Scribbles II said...

Numero uno baby!!! LMAO!!!

Anonymous said...


Anonymous said...

u really should make me ur wife..that juicegal isnt complaining...u see scribbles i can be ur beyonce..lol.
anyway..that buttcracks disgusts me eh..but i guess guys love it...and i can really relate wt ur mum..my mum is a real awka woman..she doesnt understand football(neither does my dad..lol)...so her and my dad will just be saying rubbish.or just shouting like they know what is happening..lmao!!!
i think u dont have luck wt them cos u r too much of a nice guy.

p.s:learn to reply ur comments!

Sir Scribbles II said...

@leggy: mehn wen it comes to that I know I've been a bad boy, I actually made a vow two days ago to be more reponsive to my comments so I'm sorry...Oya U know wats up now, it's me and you Leggy, till d end of time...will u blog-marry me? we can have d reception on facebook or Yahoo messenger sef lol...plus the reason isn't cos I'm too nice, it's cos I'm falling 4 d right girlz at the wrong time and philandering isn't my thang!!! wat even made you think I'm a nice guy jo!

yinkuslolo said...

free ur sista oh. old flames are really funny! like u remember why u like them and sometimes appreciate letting things be. u shud get a job, try strip club or go to summer school, eg bartenders'.

small jokes.

oh yes, i rememeber why i came here. thanx for stopping by my blog

UnderCover07 said...

Lol...we have come to luv u too Oga Scribbs; cos u always kip us laffing.

I have a friend whose mom is jst lyk urs...lol

I hate butt-cracks too, I wonder if dey dnt feel the breeze...nonsense!

Me too o no summer plans;jst waking up going to work 4days in d week and lazying about.

UnderCover07 said...

Oh yes u shd start responding to ur comments...lazy boy...lol

Rene said...

wot did i just see written by Sir S II...hmmm...leggy, we shall not quarrel and Sir Scribbles II, u dear not propose to anyone without my approval...lol
back to the post...
u r extremely random, maybe I'll beat that someday...lol
free your sister joh! if she knows you're reading it, it will be hard for her to rant about somethings.
my mum just keeps shouting when she watches any match, i'm still shocked that she has not had an heart attack.
I totally hate hearing my voice, it's so cartoon-ish
butt crack is so disgusting (with a British accent)...lol @ no PG of TV
my comment is getting long..who cares?....lemme stop now.
if you don't reply me your luck with girls will be like that guy in a movie I forget....when I remember I'll write it...

chayoma said...

Scribbs, scribbs, start showing us this kain love oh!
ur mum is a character...
lol to the crotchless jeans.
heard London is a crazy world right now...so sorry ...
and leave ur sister alone. trust me u don't wanna know what she has been up to?
Maybe the crotchless jeans wld give u some luck with the ladies...

Zena said...


Thans for checking up on me...I missed you oooh!!

Just when I thought, I was special...who are you blog marrying ehn!!

lol your mum sounds like a character, lol
DONT look for your sisters blog, I found my sisters diary once, and I've never looked at her the same way again, infact...just don't jare

I hate my voice as well, I swear when I hear myself I sound like this sexy girl with the the deep gorgeous voice and then when I hear myself I sound 2...disappointing

P'sy-A-wana said...

e be like say u wan die 4 anoda man country abi, na me u wan dey talk 2 anyhow abi, in fact ur cup don full this means war.

Imagine aftr 4 yrs u still dey 'feel sthg' mscheew my friend comport urself.

As for d girls u r not getting dont worry the crisis is rocking 9ja too not dat we feel it though lol.

p.s we (baby clan) r holding a meeting about ur illegal behavior it seems d people will get wat they want scribbles blood

Sir Scribbles II said...

@Yinkuslolo: I'm already on a training programme for a job but wiv d way things are going I'll just be stuck at home again...stripclub ke? u want to spoil me 4 my mama shey? lol

@Undercover07: Shebi I have apologised for not responding, I am changing can't u see lol.

@Rene: where have u been jo! I thot u were nt coming back that's why I hooked up wiv leggy nd juiceegal, but if u r serious we can go to Blog vegas nd do it sharp sharp lol...shebi I have replied so fix my luck please

@Chayoma: I think you are right though, I will just leave her alone untill she feels she can telll me watz up...but the curiosity is killing me.

@Zena: Finally, where did you go sef? Don't mind d marrying thing jo it's only a marriage of convenience lol, i thot i was d only one who hated hearing my own voice lol

@Gtay: Oga so u r still alive, see ehn i dey even wonder wetin u wan type sef, empty threats

koga said...

scribbles...scribbles.....hmmmn.....ur losing it o....come home to aro soon o so u can recieve ur quaterly treatment....

ps. check out my blog and tell me wat u fink....

Penelope said...

lmfao! dude ure hilarious. maybe you got it from ur moms cus she fuckin hilarious too!!!
abg free the momsi jo, i think she quite cool!
and ehn...dt bumcrack thing is nt funny oh, very eww-ish.
ok im out jo!! thnks for stopin by at me blog again!!!

Penelope said...

fuck so it turns out tht ive missed lik hw mny? 3-4post already?? has it been up to a week?..lol. you update erdai ni?
so im off to read and ud better appreciate me as a dedicated reader of this blog!!!
Peace mhn!

Sir Scribbles II said...

@Pemelope: My mum is fun wen she wants to be, I like wen she comes to visit us cos she just makes us feel like kids again, Have u missed that many posts...mehn I dey type ooo!!

Don't worry jo u r appreciated!!! I have made a vow to be replying my comments...hope u like d rest of the posts

Adaeze said...

lol this was random. i thought the girl (ur flame) was 4 yrs old! My god..Ok I get it now.
Buttcracks? Disgusting...Are u serious?
Ur mother sounds like me.. Im really trying to get it but I just dont , lol.
I hate hearing myself on recordings 2. sounds all weird.
Lastly, hmm ur sister how old is she? leave her alone poor girl she'll be so emberrased. id' die if my older brother did smoething like that to me when I was a teen. lol

BBB said...

hey scribbles...,

leave ur sis alone... give d girl her privacy.

so london is turning to lagos ehn.. *i am just picturing it i ma mind*


Lady X said...

Leave ur sis alone!!
Oh I'm really conscious about my butt crack showing when I get up from a chair or when I bend.I'm always hunting for the perfect jeans that wouldn't expose my butt crack LOL.God bless high waisted jeans!

Sir Scribbles II said...

@Adaeze: You know wen I was reading the post again it sounded d same way to me but I was hoping pple wud read the rest of the snetence b4 branding me a pedophile. You don't get football?...how can u not get it, it's God gift to mankind lol. I have decided to free my sis b4 al of u kill me!

@BBB: Okay I have heard oooo, I will free her! Omo it's true o, london is like lagos now, at least for two days

@Lady X: Thank you oh, at least we have one person still trying to keep her dignity lol..u sha like old songs o! lol

Naija bad boi.... said...

u know yday..i went for my cd..and dere was ds babe in front of me...in comparison to wat i was seeing, buttcrack wulda been childs play....ish..the gurl had half her butt showing and it wasnt even dat sexy sef...if it was i wulda kept lookin ooo...so i just tapped her and told her plainly...babes...ur a** is showing!!! eeewww

Anonymous said...

as in in dude ur updating is on a whole new level..I wanna be like you mehn..lol

The things lack of transportation can do ehn, and I think Europeans are very fond of this butt crack thing, its really quite disturbing..hiss

haha My Mum does the commentary thing during football games too, except in Yoruba..lol everyone gets so vexed but then we laugh about it later..lol

Sir Scribbles II said...

@Naija Bad boi: how many name u get sef...shey na multiple personanlity dey do you

@Tay mee: Mehn I no understand oh! iN may alone I had 20 or 21 posts. I just dey type dey go and d stories no dey finish lol. the other day i tried to explain wat an offside was to my mum...omo she no grab nathing wey I talk lol

juiceegal said...

I smell competition and sir scribbles did i hear u proposin to leggy and rene??? Lol.I leave my husband for 1 day and i get all this babes tryin to snatch him nawa o...LWKM
Ur mum is hillarious mehn......but she has to keep up nw.
Butt cracks......even guys are showin us their own these days...lol

Sir Scribbles II said...

@Juiceegal: My love I'm so sorry, it's not wat it looks like...we were rehearsing for a play lol...I swear i neva touched any of them lol...my mum tries her best but these days it's getter harder for d old folk to catch up...even guyz o i tire...grown man will be wearing his trousers on his knees these days

Lolia said...

Hahahaha @ 'crotchless jeans' and at you being first...You're not serious lol

Meanwhileeeeeeee Mummys are too funny! Are you kidding? My mummy is always saying things like that too...Something is happening and she won't understand she'll now start saying "You people should explain this thing to me" or "Why doesn't he want to share the ball?" Priceless, I tell you.

Oh and let me not lie, if I found out one of my brothers had a blog I would go and look for it asap-ishly...It's just the big brotherly/sisterly thing to do :)
But don't go and do it and then say it was me that told you oh!

Thanks for stopping by my blog, you're very welcome anytime :)


Sir Scribbles II said...

@Lolia: If I decided to talk about my mumsy in detail my blog wud shut down...they are just too much u know

I've decided to leave me sis's blog alone...for now sha lol

CultureCynic said...

apparently i miseed this one..........hahahahahahha ur mumsy is funny o...lol at pikasia ball...... i can hear it in my mind and it makes me laugh.

and butt cracks are gross and never looked good on anyone...just go naked ...pick a isde already and stop confusing pppl with the indecisiveness....the one that kills me is when girls wear jeans that is way too tight....and it lookes like they are trying to suffocate their bum....the poor crack has no choice but to gasp for air!! size 16 in a size 10 aint happening lia lia...

i cant seem to catch up on your updates....u should send me an email each time u update cuz no matter how much i frequent here, u still outpost my readings...so i got to catch up.

about ur sis having a blog, if she is anonymous, it will be hard to find her o. sometimes i wonder if i know most of the ppl that i ant see....like i could be talking to my mum and not even know it...weird scary shit....lol

Sir Scribbles II said...

@culturecynic: I've decided to leave my sister alone...until she feels comfortable telling me to read it...lol..

Butt cracks will not blind me you know. LOL@ confusing pple wiv indesiciveness lol. Like I said give me your email addy and I'll update you as often as possible

Miss Natural said...

Ur mama is hilarious!!! hahaha thats jokes man...sounds like my mum only that she goes off in some serious Yoruba haha. Nah, we're happy to read your blog, u make it so interesting and worthwile. lol. Sorry about the shitty luck you've had with girls, the time WILL come seriously. I knw I was in london during the strike and on one level it was fun, on another chaos like u said..

Sir Scribbles II said...

@Miss N:Thanks for the compliment nd d prayer as well lol...I don dey tire for una sef cos women are just stressing. The strike wasn't fun to me oh, i was just angry ehn, do u know how many pple stepped on me dat day. like I was a zebra crossing or something

NaijaBabe said...

What if Padosh was your sister? Damn, you'd cry a river!!!