a week in my mind and you won't want to go home...

Tuesday, 23 June 2009

As you see me so...

05:45 Posted by Sir Scribbles 27 comments
You know sey I be mad man? On a very serious level now I think I don dey craze small, especially since I started blogging. Before I use to be subtly mad cos the things I thot about either stayed in my mind of just faded away but these days, withe this blog of a thing, I now have an archive of my craze. Everyone that knows me has called me a mad man u know...even my own mama said I was crazy cos pple who see me think I don't talk. She said some of her friends tell her that her son is so quiet but unfortunately they don't know me...wetin my mama mean sef ehn lol?
Anyway this one is by the way sha, as you see me so....

I've been reading pples blogs (obviously) and I can't help but try and imagine what some of the bloggers look like in real life, aside 4rm those who aren't anonymous and the ones I know in real life I find myself contructing mental pictures of bloggers as a kinda exercise for my imagination, especially if they've got music on the blog, I think a person's choice of genre and playlist can give a fairly factual insight into a person looks. I have been tempted to discard the anonymity but that wud just take the fun out of this whole blogging thing for me. Anonymous bloggers cud be anyone you know, I get on the bus, I see a chick and I think "Cud that be Miss Natural?" I get on the train and I see someone reading a novel and I can't help but wonder if that's juiceegal or even someone I haven't met yet...it's fascinating you know. If I hadn't told you I was tall wud you have guessed it, if I hadn't said I was Igbo wud u have known...cos pple see me and think I'm calabar which I'm still don't know if it is a compliment or a diss.

Someone told me today that I know how to make pple feel better and no matter how down they are all they do is call me and they feel better...so ontop of being a called a comedian and funnyman which are comments I dislike wiv a passion, I have now been branded a substitute for crack shey? Nice one oh! Sometimes I don't like being called funny, back in Uni it got to a point wen all I had to do was look at someone in my class for 10 seconds and they'd start laughing...No be lie I swear. One day I tried it, I stared at this chick in my class and she started laughing, no be sey i dey make funny faces oh! After the class she walks up to me wiv one of those "I'm stuck between a laugh and a smile" kinda expressions on her face and asks me "Scribbles u r funny oh!, why were you looking at me like dat?"...Imagine d madness? One day I was in my room in Uni and a friend drops by to tell me a group of girls want to meet me cos I know one of their friends and she said I was funny and cool to hang out wiv...so essentially he wanted me to go and meet pple I'd never seen before and live up to a reputation which was propagated by someonee else wivout my knowledge...No pressure right? I tell you it was even worse than an interview cos wen I got there it was like I was supposed to entertain them, like I was hired entertainment for this night and I'd better represent...I hated feeling like that, like I was supposed to be this funny, witty guy who's cute as well, like I was being analysed you know? I just sat there and tried to keep my mouth shut...which is something I am not known for...and find hard to do especially wen I'm around 5 girls and single lol! I make a sentence..casual statement...I say do you know u can make anything sound pervy like...they turn to the supposedly witty funny guy and asks how? I say, in a husky voice, "Babe can I sharpen ur pencil?...I can answer ur Phone?...Let me press ur remote control...I can play ur CD and tune ur radio..let me fix ur car!!!" By this time I swear someone has dropped on the floor....guess there's no fighting ur true nature is there?

Pple who knew me in sec skool nd first yr Uni
an't seem to understand how I look now, like I'm some Alien inhabiting Sir Scribbles body, they expect to see that average height, tiny voice, skinny nerd who use to sing d theme song of Pokemon, memorised 150 of them in evolutionary order and was so shy of talking to girls that he use to walk on the opposite side of the road so he wudn't have to say "excuse me" to the group of chicks chatting on the walkway...guess Puberty showed them huh? The other day one 40+ looking woman was Ogling me on the bus nd I didn't even find it d least bit flattering...infact it was gross...why did i even include that here...I don't need that kind of shit my life! I met someone who saw me last wen I was in first year Uni...I shit u not wen I say she cudn't recognise me...she'd changed as well but according to her I had "changed" . She's d Old flame I was talking about in the last installment of "Scribblenation"...apperently the flame is being rekindled...on both ends....

BTW I'm a die hard Man Utd fan and wen I do die I'd like to be buried in a Man United Jersey, Ronaldo can pack his kaya nd go but wat just pisses me off is the fact that we r selling to Madrid again..they took Ruud, Heinze, Beckham and now Ronaldo...it's like they are Yahoo boys nd we r Mugus 4 crying out loud...abi our negotiotors no sabi speak spanish? There's obviously some serious communication problems, how hard is it to tell them "WE NO DEY DO AGAIN U SPANISH SODS!!!!"

Oh...I don't like editting cos I think y'all smart enough to know I'm not an iliterate...so if you F7 this nd find grammatical inconsistencies then Ndo!

27 comments:

P'sy-A-wana said...

culd it be fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiirst 4 d first time...ur blog got owned jucee eat ur heart out....i remember if i had ur abili 2 make girls laff and bad babys attitude i 4 rock dat schol tire....40 yr old huh didnt baldy tell u bout d married woman not 4 ur blog (IM)... have pix of yr 1 mayb i shuld put them out lol.

yinkuslolo said...

haha, P'sy-A u have a pic, i have started imagining how u guys look physically, put it up

Sir Scribbles II said...

@P'sy: Dude behave urself oooo! No go dey eff for for public oh...me sef get pictures of you so no just dull urself lol...dull nd u will be dulled

@Yinkuslolo: Amebo...u want to see how i looked in first year uni ba...

BBB said...

hey being funny..is a good thing its one of d things girls looks for in their dream guy......a sense of humour..
i understand d pressure but u are not obligated to make sum1 laugh...so tell them to sod off

MAN u till Jesus comes..... we survived when beckham left we survived when ruud left now we will survive without ronaldo and tevez..whats more next season we will still win multiple trophies...we are good like that

Miss Natural said...

sir scribbles you've come again. lol dont worry chances are we will meet on the bus hahaha. I was so tempted to press F7 lol. and a 40 year old woman was scoping u? dont worry she recognised teh better things of life :)

Elusivebabe♥ said...

"Babe can I sharpen ur pencil?" LOL!
Love your blog =)

Brokeass said...

loooool!
Dude I have tried imagining u MANY times!

Dont worry u dont look like a nerd AT ALL in my mind!
LMAOOOOOOOO

And yes u r funny...DEAL WITH IT jo!
lol

Tay-mee said...

ahn ahn..Why you vexing na. It's good to be able to entertain people jo. Me I wanna have your sense of humour. If you don't appreciate it, you can like to 'dash' a babe.

Rene said...

I've slacked oh! see 7 comments already all because i went to class.
I swear I've also treied imagining how people look like I've even dreamt about how they look like (don't worry I avnt seen you in my dreams yet...lol)
Can I press your remote....i don't kw and u r dis hilarious...What if I actually do know you? lol
P'sy-A-wana, abeg put the pictures!
I'm also a die hard ManU fan although I've slacked a little bit sha!

CultureCynic said...

yes i too wonder

WHY ARE THERE SOOOOO MANY ANONYMOUS NIGERIAN BLOGGERS what gives???

I demand a bring a 'photo to blog' day where i can seee everyone....

blogging has introduced me to alot of characters who i would have never met otherwise.....

being that most people who know /have met me call assume that i am crazy, i can only imagine why i am partial to you. u r funny, but i think your creativity draws me in, you are hilarious but your informed mind keeps me coming back to this space. i always wonder why u dont have 125852 comments, but then again i ve concluded that the people who come to this blog are either crazy themselves or random asskissers....the longer the post the better, the more off kilter it is, the harder i will laugh, your sarcasm is certainly not lost on CC...

Tinu said...

I dnt know I feel so happy when people tell me that Im funny!!!
Im actually trying to imagine u now sef!

Sir Scribbles II said...

@BBB: My sister sometimes it can be annoying oh! sometimes pple just expect you to say comical stuff everytime. Mehn Sir ALex better arrange himself and buy someone quick oh! me i no hear story

@Miss N: U know our own gist is differnt. DOn't dull me oh!

@Elusivebabe: I swear u can make anything sound pervy..."let me post of ur blog" lol. Thanks d love oh! Me coming over to urs soon

@Brokeass:in ur imagination to do I have an afro...coz i've always wanted one but can't grow one cos it gives me headaches. I can't look Nerdy jo, that's ion my past lol. Well I think I'm gonna have to live with it shey?

@Tay-mee: LOL! NOOOO!! I go like keep my sense of humour no vex...don't worry I will be funny for both of us ehn!

@Rene: YEs you have slacked, both as a top commentator and Man Utd fan...I don't like to appear in pple's dream ooo! Cos anything wey kap there I won't be able to defend myself. Una all be Amebo oh! U want to see pictures of me in first yr..I OBJECT!!!!!

@Culture Cynic: Did I tell you how much I love ur long comments...well I do thanks. Seriously I'd like to dumb the whole anonymous steez but mystery is much more fun. I'm going to frame ur comment and put it up on my wall...see all d compliments oh..I am humbled lol. But wait why u dey call my pple crazy ehn...watch it oh!

@Tinu: If it helps I can tell you that I am a guy lol

@

chayoma said...

Scribbs,
see me rolling with laughter...
P'sy-A, RELEASE the pictures oh! we want to see the funnyman himself...lol
*i jokes, but hey u never know*

a little funny bone never hurt nobody
:)

G-FUNC said...

I once used to first this blog oh!
I used to do it without effort,infact I used to relax and come here like three days after a post has been put up and I would still be first,even if there where people who had already commented.I would just shift all their names and write mine as first *scribbles talk sey e dey study computer,e no reach!*
but now wey I don make scribbles who e be today,the boy has the nerve to write sey e funny die ever since puberty.Dey give props to him mama sey na she first identify him craze.Who was the first person that called you craze? eh SCRIBBLES CHUKWU "SIR" Tell me oh!

rubbish,kpshewwwwwwwwwwwwww......!!!!

lol *na you teach me he he he*

Sir Scribbles II said...

@Chayoma: STOP MOTIVATING HIM JO! the dude likes to make empty threats sef so I'm not scared, plu si have pix of hime too so if he dulls me I will dull him lol

@G-FUNC: LMAO!! I remember those days oh! Na so life be guy lol! Wey boyz go dey find comment like sey na fuel 4 naija...nd why u gatz bring my mama into this ehn..wetin dey worry you ehn!!

Lady X said...

Please o being funny is a really really good thing! I would pick a funny guy over one that isn't funny any day! Everyone wants someone that would make them happy in some way. Your humor attracts people to you jare. Use it as a weapon too for all those chicks you wanna get with lol

leggy said...

lol....substitute for crack...im going to start using that from now on!!lol

Sir Scribbles II said...

@Lady X: As a weapon my ex?...I'm a lover not a fighter lol. I've heard that many times but i can't help but feel that funny pple aren't taken seriously u know

@Leggy: u can use it if you are willing to pay royalty

Rene said...

@ P'sy-A-wana: name your price.
@ Scribbles: it's not easy juggling all the things in my life and not slack.
You are my crack from now...lol

UnderCover07 said...

I think u shd see being funny as a gud thing; I wld take a funny guy over a boring dude any day! And true ppl myt not tke u seriously, but it gives u room to put them to shame and prove them wrong! It's a gift...and am glad I found ur blog o...e dey help to mke me happy and laff.

Ride on Scribbs!

And yeah, I normally think of wat bloggers luk lyk...for lyk meet some but not sure I wanna give up anonymity yet. :)

CultureCynic said...

i reckon the derogatory comments and my constant public defamations r just a few ways that i proclaim my affection for you. take it or leave it S,take it or leave it! (insert obligatory "LOL")

Nice Anon said...

I guess real madrid is trying to be stronger this coming season. Whatever he was too cocky anyway. We made him who he is today and let's hope he doesn't end up like "Beckham"

BSNC said...

wait you said you don't like it when people say you are funny. How i wan take talk am now. ok .... um.. you make be, abeg jare you are funny and its actually a compliment. Oya tell me thank you..


So you are krazy. i said it, i said it..shey i talk for my last comment. okay oo

Naija bad boi.... said...

dude...every gurl wants a guy dat can make her laugh oo...how do u fink i get all my escapades huh? by telling them about jack and jill?? harrumph!! funny is cool joo....

and oh...psy...i got a pic too...people, start bidding!!!!

P'sy-A-wana said...

guy d whole clan begged me not 2 diss u, but now u don match live wire, we go hold a conclave and see d outcome
@naija bad boi make we pool resources jo!!!!

NaijaBabe said...

Scribbles, you are funny oh!

LOL Sorry I just had to do that.

Oh and on the 80milla case, I reserve my comments till I find the baba that is giving Real the jazz they are using...the others didnt hurt that much apart from Ruud, then Ronaldo. May their jerseys burn in the changing room and their pitches get flooded with stagnant, unrelenting rain water. May thunder strike all the floodlights on their training grounds as well. NONSENSE!!

NaijaBabe said...

And the picture...Im drawing in faces o